feelings | lai guanlin

12

Jihyun's POV

I was dragged home by my parents who have no idea that I was working. Apparently Mrs Kang called them to ask about my situation.

doomed.

I was forced to kneel in front of the religious statue for hours to reflect on my actions.

" Why must you work ? Your studies aren't even coping well ! " My dad screamed while my mom tried to calm my dad down.

" Your mom and I work every day and night hoping to give you and Jisoo a better living environment , Why can't you just understand that ?! " Tears welled up my eyes.

" That's why I want to work ! I don't want you guys struggling just to raise us , you guys aren't young anymore , what if something happens ?! " They were shocked at what I just said.

" Don't you dare step into that Chicken store again ! Otherwise I will break your two legs ! " My dad screamed before going into his room , slamming the door.

My mom helped me up and applied some medication on my bruised knees. I winced in pain the moment my skin got in contact with the medication.

" You know how your father is like , his always this hot tempered. Don't be upset by him because he just wants to give you and your sister a better life. " I nodded.

" I know but I want to help too , I don't want to rely on the both of you. I can work at the store since Uncle Young gives us free chicken and I don't have to spend money from both of your pockets. " My mom patted my head.

" I know your filial but your dad doesn't want you to suffer after what happened a few years ago. " she said and I nodded.

What happened a few years ago was that I used to have a brother but he passed away because of food poisoning since we didn't have enough money to buy food so he went to find food in the garbage.

It caused the bacteria to enter his blood stream and then he passed on.

It was a really tough period for us since my brother means a lot to all of us. His always smiling widely , trying to lit up the whole atmosphere.

Now that his gone , It's never the same.

I hugged my mom tightly as she remembered the memory of my brother. He was the most filial among us , he took up a few part time jobs but at the same time able to cope with his studies.

My dad felt even more guilty because on the day of that incident , they had a fight and he forced him to get out of the house after finding out that he cheated on a test.

I hope I did tried to save him but I didn't.

He wanted to score better results because it was my dad's birthday soon and he wants him to be proud.

It's not a reason to cheat but no one knew about that other than Jisoo and I. If only I did try to help him , maybe it would work and he would still be here.

Even though his physically not with us anymore , but he will always be emotionally with us.

My mom went into the room while I sat on the couch thinking about life. Is it my fault that all bad things happened ? My brother and Seonho.

I held in my tears as the door opened.

I heard foot steps coming nearer to me and soon I saw a pair of legs standing in front of me. He kneeled down and observed my knees.

" How did this happened ? " Guanlin asked and I couldn't hold it in anymore and I burst into tears. I cried so hard that I could have a crying competition with the babies and I won.

I cried in his embrace as he patted my back lightly.

" G-Guanlin , Is it a-all my fault ? " He shook his head before releasing from the hug and staring straight into my eyes.

" Never ever think that it's all your fault. " Tears continued rolling down my cheeks as he continued talking.

" You helped me , I used to be that little emotionless guy that have no emotions except for anger. If I didn't faint at the bus stop , we wouldn't be close. Therefore , I'm glad that I did faint. " He chuckled as he wiped my tears away.

" So , Never think that it's your fault because you bring happiness into my life. " He hugged me again.

" And your the definition of happiness to me. "

My heart raced even faster than before. Can Guanlin stop talking for a second ? Every single stare he shot me , every single word that came out from his mouth can make my heart race.

" You might not accept me but I don't mind. Just don't stop me from liking you , otherwise I would really go crazy. " He chuckled.

" Others' might say this is puppy love but I don't really care about all that because puppy love or not , it's still love. " He caress my hair slowly.

" I used to have no feelings for you honestly , but for some reason after I live in your house , the feelings just got stronger. I didn't care about your appearance , okay maybe a little but to me your beautiful no matter what. " He hugged me even tighter.

" So I'm going to be a bear for today and you can cry as much as you want in my shoulder. " He smiled.

" Honestly , since before I already have feelings for you but I didn't dare to say anything since people might kill me for it. " I chuckled and He released from the hug , wide-eyed.

" After you stayed in my house , the feelings just got stronger even though at some point of time I hated you so much because you occupied my room. " I chuckled.

" Then why can't we be together ? " I shrugged.

" My parents might not allow a- "

" Please take good care of my daughter. "

29th July 2017

I felt like a third wheel , in the middle of the Korean friend of mine and my other friend HAHAHA.