In my feelings

1. PACKING UP THE PAST

The breeze gently flowed through the slightly opened window, caressing my neck gently as I tied my hair up, tucking in any loose strands behind my ear.

I grabbed my list once again from my desk, making sure I had everything packed in my suitcases. I packed my last pair of socks before heading downstairs for a break.

The silence took up the whole house as I reached the bottom of the stairs. All that was heard was the creak my footsteps left as I stepped down the wooden stairs individually. I wasn't the only one in the house, but the quietness of the indoors indicated almost that.

"Eva! We're in the living room." A voice bursted.

That voice belonging to my mother.

I slowly walked towards the room ahead and peaked my head through the open door. "Hey," I initiated, hesitantly looking around.

I noticed my dad, sat on the armchair opposite to my mum who sat right in the centre of the larger sofa, legs crossed.

"Sit Eva, It'd be appreciated if you could come and run over these last minute plans one last time. Before you leave tomorrow."

You've got to be joking...

"It's a little bit late for that now, mum." I whined, getting ready to leave the room.

"Eva, hear your mum out." My dad butted in quickly as he noticed me trying to escape.

I literally counted to ten. Just hoping he would change his mind and agree that she was pushing it. I gave my dad the benefit of the doubt and sat myself on the corner of the couch my mum was seated on, letting out a long sigh.

I looked towards her, staring in indication that she could go on.

"We have always been very proud of you and are grateful for such an intelligent, loving child."

The confusion washed over my face as I looked over at my dad, who nodded gracefully at mums words.

"Mum-"

"We do feel that this once, you're headed down the wrong path. As your parents, we just want to make sure-"

"What? Is this you trying to change my mind? We've spoken about this! You're just stressing me out now, I'm not changing my mind." I answered, exaggerating my tone of voice.

She sat there silently for a second before she adjusted herself on the sofa.

"I didn't plan on this conversation ending this way but since you're not going to listen, then we'll do this the hard way, Eva. This dream of yours is a long shot. Becoming a successful writer and securing an income out of it is nearly impossible! Especially you-"

"Love-" my dad held out his hand as he widened his eyes, suggesting for her to stop.

"Not to mention having to continually produce best-sellers. You've never had to work hard, and now all of a sudden you want to move away and make a living on your own whilst wasting three years of your life at a University that won't benefit you in the long run? Do you know how hard me and your dad have worked for you?" She exclaimed, irritation vivid in her face.

It was all coming out last minute. Frustration filled me before I decided to calm myself down and realise this wouldn't change anything, and that I wasn't prepared to leave on a bad note.

"You're making this out to be a selfish decision of mine. For once I want to do my own thing, something I've never been able to do. If you don't believe in me then that's on you, because I'm willing to risk everything." I responded, glancing over to my dad who silently watched with what seemed to be disappointment.

Now whether it was at me or my mother, I had no idea.

"Please let me work for something for once. Let me make you proud. Jesus mum, If it doesn't work out I won't say a word on it anymore. I'll follow whatever you want me to follow, I'll go back to working with you. Whatever it is you want."

Silence brewed as everyone's eyes locked on mine.

"How will I know I'm making a mistake if I never try it out?"

The longing exasperation burst into the room again, as no one spoke a word.

This was my last day with both my parents for who knows how long until I visited and this is how they wanted me to remember saying goodbye.

A whisper crept into the room as I mentally cursed myself, preparing for another argument.

"Okay."

What?

"Okay?"

"Okay! When it all goes wrong, which I assure you will happen, remember, I told you so."

As soon as the words fell out of her mouth, her shoulders relaxed as a sigh escaped her lips. I grinned as gracefully as I could.

"Thank you." I reached for her hand as I gripped onto it tightly. "I promise I won't let you down."

"Right." Was all that left her mouth.

The bitterness was still clear, but I was happy enough that she had decided to give up and accept it. That was a huge step for her, believe me.

I looked over at my dad who pulled himself off the sofa and embraced me as soon as he reached me.

"Please take care of yourself out there, sweetheart." He softly kissed the top of my head.

I closed my eyes as I leaned my head into his chest. "I've got it dad." I pulled away and looked at both of my parents.

"I know you're not exactly over the moon about this, but thank you for accepting it." I slightly smiled. Even if you've nagged the whole time.

"You're right when you sa-" My father quickly grabbed the back of my mums arm, giving it a gentle squeeze as he interrupted her.

"I think what she's trying to say is that it's not what we would've chosen for you, but that doesn't matter at all. This is your life, and we'll support you no matter what it is you decide to do. As long as you're happy, we're happy."

I couldn't help but grin as I thanked both of them and took myself upstairs again to carry on packing.

NYU, It's just you and me now.