Emotionless (Septiplier)

5.

~Sean~

The morning made itself apparent to me as the golden yellow calm of the gentle light shone through the bleak curtains. It rested upon my face as the shrill warning of my bedside alarm sung, telling me that a new day had arrived and I had to face the one person able to mix up my emotions into a storm cloud of confusion.

It was time to get up, dust myself off from the insanity I let overwhelm myself last night, and go see Mark. I wasn't completely sure of my thoughts on once again encountering him today, but when was I really sure of myself when I was around him? It had only been two days and yet my mind was a whirlwind of emotions and confusion, however what can you expect from the only person on this planet with emotions? 

I was also thinking of what he might say to me when we did indeed meet again. Will he say something rude? Not likely, manners are a big rule that is to be followed. Will he even speak to me? I'm not entirely sure, however I do know one thing, Mark won't think much of what happened. I freaked out on him sure, but he can't comprehend what I was putting behind those words. He has no emotion, something I have to keep reminding myself of, as I get a much different feeling when around him. 

However, despite all the feelings of doubt and uncertainty I have, I am also excited to see him once again. I'm not sure what it is about him that makes me feel this way. There's nothing about him that makes him stick out from the crowd, except for the way he is built physically. There's just something about him that makes me feel like I can tell him everything, and I just feel different around him. 

I guess my thoughts on him are conflicting. It's strange how the doubt is canceled out by everything that makes me attracted to him, well for the most part. I may feel like I can be myself around him and I can tell him everything that I feel, but the fact that I have never felt like this before pushes that away slightly, not to mention I only just met this guy.

Before I can go any deeper into my thoughts, I pull myself together, reminding myself that I have somewhere to be. I slide out of my bed that I quickly tidy up as I dig my feet into the plush carpet, pulling myself over to my closet. I pull out the same neatly hung clothes from my closet and slip them on, adjusting my tie in the mirror as I think about how dreary these clothes are. I then clamber down the stairs and into the kitchen, sliding into my chair to eat the breakfast that was presented before me. 

After the same routine as yesterday and the day before, I arrived at school. I shift uncomfortably in the line as we wait to enter the school. I'm anxious, much more than I thought I'd be. However, when an emotion presents itself to me, it tends to be as strong as possible. 

I inhale deeply as the line starts to move inside the building. I decide that I would follow the line properly instead of hopping out immediately today. I just feel like I need a little more time before I arrive in the classroom which I know both Mark and I share. 

Once I finally arrive at my locker, I fiddle with the lock a little longer than normal. I guess my hands are quite shaky at the moment. Once I get my locker open, I stare at it blankly for a moment and catch my breath. The closer I get to seeing Mark, the more uneasy I feel. I shake my head, trying to clear it. I grabbed a few books that were neatly stacked on top of one another.

I then leave, making my way down to the classroom, which seemed a lot closer than it normally was. I shook my head again. It's just an illusion my mind created for me. Classrooms don't just move suddenly. 

Then I was stood right in front of the large wooden door of the classroom. I took one last deep breath as I stepped inside. The atmosphere seemed to change. It was a lot more stuffy and crowded. It was quieter as well, it was silent almost. Despite the fact that I wanted to run as fast as I could back out the door of the classroom, I placed a shaky foot forward, on after another until I reached my seat. l

I sat down in the chair, completely utterly aware of Mark's presence beside me. I tried my best to look forward and not glance at the boy beside me, however that plan was thrown out the window when Mark spoke up. 

"Hello Sean." 

I bit my lip and turned my head towards him.

"Hey Mark," I said quietly, nervousness written in my voice. 

A silence fell over the two of us. We sat unmoving, not lifting a finger. We were just sitting in the pool of unspoken words and actions as we waited for the other to speak. Thankfully, the silence was broken as class started. We turned our attention away from each other, concentrating on our own work. However, the thought of Mark still lingered in the back of my mind. 

The thought of him next to me, the thought of how only four words were passed between us. The thought of how strange he acted after I said hello back to him. He isn't supposed to have emotions, right? But at that moment of complete silence, both of us completely still while facing each other, it seemed as if we both felt this awkwardness in the air around us. It seemed like we were both frozen because we each felt something about each other. It was as if we shared something in that moment that no one else could. 

Could it be that I shared emotion with him? 

*Warning: rant ahead*

GUESS WHO'S BACK??? Yep. It's me. I am alive, even though it felt like I was dying for a few days. If you read my authors note in the last chapter you would know that I got my wisdom teeth out. Let me tell you, it's terrible. I was so swollen that I could barely eat or talk. It was super painful the first few days after the surgery. Also the swelling wasn't supposed to be as bad as it was, but my body was like "no bitch I'm going to make you look like a fucking balloon." So once we realized that it wasn't normal we had to go back to the doctor and he told me basically what was happening was that my cheeks were filling up with liquid because my body was trying to protect myself from being hurt while I heal or something so I had to take more medicine. Also I can only eat soft foods and there is only so many soft foods in the world and I'm sick of most soft foods (not ice cream though). Technically I'm still not done yet, I'm still healing, but I'm almost done healing. I was also left with some nice bruises on the side of my face thanks to my body for bruising easily. 

Anyways, that aside, school is almost here and I'm not ready for high school (help I'm so scared.) And if you noticed I'm trying to improve my writing and add more details and metaphors and stuff, hopefully you like it. And as always I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Bye!!