dear devonne

[6]

The minute I pressed send I turned my phone off and rolled over in the tiny bed.

My eyes began droop close when I heard a tiny whimper, almost inaudible.

I rolled back over to face where Lola was laying to find her eyes wide open and full of fear.

"Momma," she whispered. I sighed and pulled her into my chest as she clung into me. I kissed her forehead softly and stroked her hair, tears streaming down my face.

Lola eventually fell back asleep, but no matter how much I tried I couldn't.

I pursed my lips together in though before grabbing my phone once again and turning it back on.

I had a new message from Demi but I couldn't be bothered to read it. I was done hearing what any of them wanted to say.

Rolling my eyes I went to my contacts list before my eyes landed on the one person who I was looking for.

Hayley.

I knew that it was wrong to be calling her so late, considering it was now one o' clock in the morning, but I needed her.

The phone rang for what seemed like forever before an unusually chirpy Hayley answered with an enthusiastic, "Devonne! You little bitch, you never called yesterday! How is everything going!? How's Texas been treatin' ya?"

I giggled before a frown stretched across my face.

"Hey. Um, that's actually what I'm calling about.." I trailed off. The line went silent for a moment before Hayley spoke again, a concerned tone now in her voice.

"What happened?"

"I kind of got into an argument with Dallas, and then Maddie..

"And where are you now?"

"At some shitty motel for the night. Early tomorrow morning I'm going to go to the bank and get me some money out for a few plane tickets."

Hayley sighed, "Devonne.."

"Don't Devonne me."

"Babe, aren't you still saving up for college?"

"Well, yeah, I guess so, but it's not like I'm going to ever actually be able to go back.."

"Don't say that. You're a smart girl, Devonne. I know it's one of your life long wishes to finish."

"Yeah but Lola-"

"I've told you that I don't mind to watch Lola if you needed me to."

"Can we talk about this later?"

"Fine. But you're not coming back to New York. You need to stay in Texas and resolve this little war that you've had with your family. Im not letting you come back like this."

"I wasn't giving an option."

"You know what, I'm not your mom so there's obviously nothing I can do about it. If you're actually going to waste all of that money and come back, so be it, but I trust you to make the right decision."

"Oh, so you're going to guilt me into it?"

"I sure as hell can try."

"I'm coming back. End of story."

"Alright, I'll see you later then. Goodnight, Chica," she sighed defeatedly.

"Night."

I rolled ended that call and put my phone back on my dresser before rolling over to cuddle with Lola.

I was stupid for ever coming back. I don't need anyone else besides my daughter. This is my family.

*~*

"Where are we going, Momma?" I glanced at Lola sitting in the back seat.

"Home," I answered simply.

"Why? I want to go play with Mad."

"Because I said so."

She huffed, "That's not a good enough reason."

"Don't start with me, Little Miss."

We sat in silence for a moment before the taxi driver glanced over at me.

"Family trouble?"

I hesitated, "Something like that."

"My advice? You can't solve your problems with the same thinking you used to create them. If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Running away from your problems will only make things worse."

I sighed quietly to myself. Since when did taxi drivers become so insightful?

"We're here, Ms."

I lifted my head up to find that we were in fact already at the airport.

This is it.

I rummaged through my back and pulled out fifty dollars, handing it over to the driver.

"I can't take this."

"Yes you can. And you will. C'mon, Lola."

I opened the car door and went to the back, helping Lola out carefully.

"Thank you.."

"Devonne."

"Thank you, Devonne."

"No, thank you," I smiled before turning my attention back to Lola and our small suitcases. I placed the luggage down on the sidewalk before watching the bright yellow car drive away.

As soon as I reached over to grab our suitcases me and Lola were bombarded by millions of flashing lights.

"DEMI!"

"DEMI, OVER HERE!"