Love Happens: The Story of Stella and Jose

Could I Handle This Love?

CHP 8

Stella's pov:

'I can't stop crying...' I think to myself as I begin to overthink things, as per the usual, 'Can I handle the emotions that I'm feeling? Can I accept that this is just a crush? Could I live with him rejecting my feelings? This feeling I want to share with him... what happens if it doesn't happen at all?'

I allow for the negative to settle into my mind, but I feel my heart push back.

'There could be a chance for this love to happen,' I begin to let my heart speak to me, 'There could be a chance that the feelings are mutual, and he feels that same way I do. That both of our hearts race when we see each other... Or that we are always thinking of each other, when we aren't together.'

After thinking of all the positive, I start to think, aloud, of outside forces hat could rain on my parade, "Paige. Paige and her petty squad would do everything in the book to keep me unhappy, and keep Jose to herself. I mean, that girl gets any guy she wants, whenever she wants them."

After stating that aloud, I realized how powerful that statement was. And a part of me got so angry over it, "I can't let that bitch have him!" I shouted to myself, and then calmed back down, "Jose is too sweet, too good for her, overall. I can't let her grab him from me, otherwise I'll be a sick mess." All of these feelings race through my mind and heart, I realized that in the end, Jose was worth these feelings.

Jose could see the real me. He could open my heart up, this much, and I want to share these emotions with him. But would he be able to handle my dark past? Would he accept me, a girl who prefers reading books and poetry over partying, among many other things? Could he bring out a confidence that I feel like I never had...?

He might be the one to bring out the happy, carefree Stella that I can be. I know he's able to handle my normal self, when I'm shy and quiet. But with everything else about me? I don't know.

But my biggest question is can I handle him?

He's a jock, and had a high social status in school. He's a popular guy, and the whole school knows his name. Would his guy friends like me? Are there any other girls going after him, excluding Paige? Would the school accept us as a couple, and leave us be? I know I'm not the model girl, that doesn't have the curves that guys go crazy for- but I am a wishful girl with her eyes on her dream and studies. And I strive for more in life than temporary recognition by my peers, I want more out of my life in the long run.

My biggest question can't be 'Can I handle him'? It should be 'Can I handle of that, as a whole'?

Dreams of being with him is totally different from the reality of being with him. And as much as I can be hopefully towards us working out together, the thought of our two worlds colliding makes my stomach flip upside down. This love business isn't like a Disney Princess movie, but I wish it was. Because that would mean a happy ending, no matter what happens.

Jose's pov:

As I work out, and practice on the punching bag, I start to think on a specific topic that had been sitting in the back of my head for a while, 'Could Stella be the one to accept and handle me, as I am? Can she handle being in the same social spotlight I'm in, back at the school? And be able to accept my over-protectiveness, my past, and so much more?'

I begin to sit on the thoughts and actions and the history of everything I've gone through up until now. It's so much to take in, and accept... And some of those issues are still alive, and with others, I think I try to keep them alive longer than they need to be. I know that my dad isn't leaving my life, and that my hulk-like anger hasn't really gone away. But, I can't let people like Vanessa out of my heart...

Stella might have a hard time taking all of that in, and as for the situation with Vanessa- she might not feel as loved because of it. But I know that she can accept it all, regardless. I already feel like telling her every single event that has happened. I feel like letting it go, and having her be the way out.

But, I still just don't know. If I let her be my saving grace, in this case, I might scare her away with my anger, my lifestyle, or just by being myself. By seeing past me, Jose the boxer and star football player at our school, would she be capable of loving me back?

The only way to really know is to let her know me better, but outside of school. Maybe then, she can see me as a guy that can truly love her, and be in love with her.

Author's Note:

Hey guys- we are so sorry for the wait on these chapters! We hope you enjoy them and PLEASE continue to comment as you read. Feedback is so beneficial to us as we get used to this.

~BriCri16:)~