Injuries From My Mouth

It Wasn't Supposed To Hurt Me Too

It Wasn't Supposed To Hurt Me Too

I think I now know pain
I think I understand how your lips can speak words
And create damage that no one else can.

I feel as if all this time I spent with you
Was all for nothing
Was just so I could be used as your toy
So you could show me off but never look at me.

Tell me, what lingers in my soul?
What makes me scared at night
When I'm alone in the dark?
What makes me cry out your name for protection?

What do I love in the world?
What things make my heart skip a beat
And make my eyes well with happy tears?
Tell me what makes me who I am.

I ask you questions of things you should know.
Not hard questions,
Ones with simple answers if you ever cared to listen.
Answers I've repeated and screamed but you never heard.

The only time you opened your ears
Is when my body was laid out in front of you,
When I was submissive and you made me a victim
Of your selfish ways.

The only time you looked into my mind
Is when it was clear of clothing
Free of makeup,
Yet all you listened to was "kiss me".

You told me you'd be there,
I expected it, tried to trust it,
But sadly every attempt failed.

Must I show you physical pain
For you to hear my cries for help?
Do you not see what's going on in my mind?

I left you today, and I know it came as a shock
I stood up for myself for once,
And I finally didn't feel lost.

Your words barely had emotion,
I knew you would cry.
I thought after all our "love",
You'd be hurt when I said goodbye.