My book of randomness

Farewell, Laura Palmer

I've changed.

That doesn't seem so special right? Everybody changes after all. I'm not anymore the same Joëlle as I was ten years ago. Ten years ago I was in primary school, and all I did was stare at the floor because I was too shy to do otherwise. Now I'm a girl who made friends and is not afraid to let hear of herself when it's important. But that's not what I wanted to talk about.

You've all probably seen it already, it's about Laura Palmer. The song, not the Twin Peaks character. As you all probably know (I've never made a secret of it after all) the song has been my favorite for ages. At first because it was released on my birthday (June 3) but later because it meant so much to me. The song became a symbol of how I overcame the worst period of my life.

Recently I discovered the song doesn't appeal to me that much anymore. Laura Palmer started to mean less and less to me, where the anchor started to mean a lot to me. Also considering my current situation, I've concluded something by that. I've changed, like I said at the beginning. Laura Palmer was the symbol of me during and after my cyber bullied period, the anchor stands for how my friends and family unintentionally helped me to process it. They didn't (and still don't ) know what exactly happened, but they made me feel confident again, they accepted my flaws and made clear I deserve to live, and I deserve people caring about me, even though, especially in the beginning, I totally disagreed; I've heard the exact opposite for months after all. They didn't know what happened yet they gave me exactly what I needed. They gave me an anchor instead of a gun to shoot at the sky.

By leaving Laura Palmer behind, I left that period behind me. I'm not acting like it never happened, it changed me too much for that, but I've finally been able to give it a place, to accept it. I'm no longer the girl that has super depressing days (especially when the "you don't deserve ......." Voices are too loud) where she posts super depressing tweets and walks around at school crying, I've left that period behind. Finally. Farewell, Laura Palmer.