Lady Eilean

Chapter 8

The months until Walther's clandestine wedding passed in a dreamlike state. The Gathering completed, all the visitors packed up and traveled back to their home hearths. Spring bloomed bright and warm, its fast-moving, refreshing breezes blowing through the castle and chasing away the gloom of winter. Every morning, Ian roused me before dawn and raced me to the stables — soon I could keep up with him. A few times I even beat him. We rode for hours in the mornings, traversing the great expanse of land that made up Ellesmure. He showed me outposts and towns, small villages, and neighboring estates that paid fealty to our family. We returned in time for breakfast where I was often sore, drenched, and bone-tired. I was also the happiest I had ever been. A lightness took root in my chest. All of a sudden, it was exciting to wake up and face a new day. The pain and discomfort of hours on horseback were nothing compared to this newfound liberation. Steadily, my brothers joined Ian and I and before long, all eight of us rode out in the mornings in a thundering herd. If we woke the castle, we were never scolded. After a few weeks, Alex joined us, too. Riding hard alongside me, the wind would toss back his golden curls. We'd share breathless laughter as we raced each other across open fields and into the dawn.

After breakfast, Ian led me through an exacting routine of education. He taught me to read and balance ledgers, quizzed me on the market rate of seed corn, and ensured I understood basic medicine and healing. Land deeds were to be analyzed, rent minimums and maximums debated. I was ordered to read long, meandering law books of local, Island, and Mainland regulations. Balancing the demands of the estate — Stormway — against its pantry and cellars was a particularly tricky activity that made me fret and worry over the slightest allotments of wheat and butter.

In using my body, I felt more at home inside of it. Everything was easier: walking, sitting, dancing, sleeping. Muscles strained were muscles strengthened. Only Mother looked on disapprovingly as I consumed more and more food. My exertions on land and in the classroom made me famished to the point of near-constant irritability. At night, after dinner, my brain and body were so spent I dozed off and on as I listened to my brothers regaling each other with tales of their daily heroism. Under their narration, chopping wood or taming a horse became monumental achievements. Alex sat amongst us, teasing them with a freedom I didn't yet feel. They were boisterous and lively and I was tired and still trying to learn who they were. My silence was different from the old familiar fog of neglect and unease. I was comfortable in their chaos and glad to have an invitation into their world. Life, I realized, could be enjoyable.

One day, as I was pouring over the regiment lists and military records of the Islands, something clicked in my mind. I found the courage to ask Ian, once again, why he had been so adamant in taking over my education. It was partially a ruse to buy myself a moment's rest from study. My eyes were dry and blurring the regimental colors of each house into a mess of colors and regalia.

Ian frowned and nodded, "Go to the map, tell me what you see."

Grateful for any excuse to leave the registers behind, I walked to the map that now hung on the wall and studied it. I tried to find a story that went beyond the jagged cliff lines and rolling pastures. My instruction with Ian was practical, the answer would be in the map. I had to look beyond what it displayed at first glance. I considered the greatness of the Mainland, but also how it was contained by Ellesmure. How the island — my island — curved around it protectively. The Mainland had more farmland and cattle lands. Their industry was predominantly agrarian. The Islands we controlled trade, precious resources, textiles, and access to the sea and the continents that lay far beyond.

"Land. Fertile land. Land that we protect from waves and storms with our mountains and cliffs. Land that could feed and provide for us, all within reach. A short boat ride away."