The Replacement Boyfriend

Chapter 31

Zayne

Explaining my feelings after I got into a fight with Tace and then got rejected by her was impossible. I was angry and hurt and confused and I didn't know what to do. What had I expected? For her to fall in love with me because she dated Dane and I had been pretending to be him? She was right. It sounded ridiculous. It was stupid. Me trying to replace Dane as her boyfriend was stupid and all it took to burst my bubble was her to point it out like she had.

"Dude, you're pacing," Asher told me, playing random keys on his keyboard. "I can't concentrate so just tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing," I lied. "Everything." I sighed.

"Wow," he said sarcastically. "And I thought girls were crazy."

"She rejected me," I groaned, falling face first onto my bed.

"What? You told her you liked her?" he asked, as if he wanted to pick at my wounds.

"Yeah and I got rejected. I just said that," I muttered. "She thought I was acting like Dane-"

"You did have a character change after that night your brother came to sort things out with her," he told me and I groaned into my pillow. "I was wondering what was up with you."

"You don't need to rub it in," I told him. "I think she likes Jax, too."

"You need to get over her, man," he sighed, playing a few piano keys. "If you still want to be friends with her, that is."

"Of course, I still want her in my life," I looked up for a second but he didn't look at me.

"Then you have to get over her or you're going to do something stupid and fight with her again," he said while looking at his sheet music. "Then maybe she'll decide she doesn't want you in her life."

"She wouldn't do that-"

"You said she was changing into a different person right in front of you," he cut me off. "Don't be so sure."

And even though I knew she'd never be able to cut me out of her life, I still felt the fear of the possibility. I had to talk to her but after she had the night to calm down.

***

"Tace, can we talk?" I caught Tace before she could enter the cafeteria for lunch.

She nodded at Cassidy, Ahana and Yu Na to go ahead without her and even though Cassidy looked a little hesitant, she left with their other roommates, leaving Tace alone with me outside.

"She's talking to you again," it was more of a statement than a question but she nodded anyway. "Guess it's not my place to ask why you guys fought."

"What is it, Zayne?" she asked calmly.

"I'm sorry about yesterday," I told her and she looked at me, confused. "Not about telling you how I feel. I'm sorry for forcing you to talk about something you didn't want to talk about. Can you forgive me?"

The sides of her lips tugged up and she smiled and nodded. "Yeah," she answered which seemed too easy since we had never made up after fights so maturely. It had always been Dane who forced us to apologize to each other or rather for me to apologize to her since I had always been the one who did something stupid.

"About my feelings for you-"

"I'm sorry," she cut me off. "I-I do l-love you but not the way you want me to."

My eyes widened. It was the first time I had heard her say those words directly to someone in the eighteen years of her existence. And even though it was more of a rejection, it still felt good.

"I think it's time I move on," I told her, knowing she felt guilty about rejecting me.

"And to answer your question from yesterday," she kicked a stone with her shoe. "I'm going out with Jax today. He's going to ask me out."

Even though I felt like I heart was being ripped open, I forced a smile and nodded. She had to know I was happy for her. Couldn't I be happy for her? Even though I was sad for me?

"I'm happy you found someone you like. It's better than me acting like a replacement boyfriend for Dane," I told her and I meant it.

"I'll still need you, Zayne," she looked at me and frowned, as if I was going to leave her because she was dating Jax now.

"And I'll still be there," I told her and she forced a smile. "I can be mature if I want to be."

"Sure," she laughed and I swatted her arm lightly. "I know you can. Maybe I can set you up with someone? Ahana?"

"She'd kill me," I said quickly, laughing it off. "I can find a girl for myself."

"I'm sure you can," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I don't doubt it."

"I'll have a smoking hot girlfriend by next semester," I told her jokingly. "Wait and see."

"I hope so," she nodded. "But I'll still be the number one girl in your life, right?"

I looked at her and nodded. "None of this is going to change anything between us."

"Promise?" she asked me.

"Promise."