when i told you i was leaving
that rainy night on the phone
i asked if you were gonna be fine
and you said,
“yeah, of course”
and you said,
“eventually, we’re all going to be”
and i think that was a disguise for
“i don’t care”
and i think that was a mask for
“i am indifferent”
because you didn’t love me anymore
and i think that was my cue to let go
but you were as wrong
as you could ever be
because when you said “we”
you meant “i” was going to be fine
and you just did not bother to return
the question, to ask if i was going to be fine
because i wasn’t fine,
because when the screen finally said ‘call ended’
i fell to the floor and my body may have been
in one piece, but my heart was shattered all over
the place and i could feel half of my soul evaporating
and it was as if the world had stopped just for me to
feel the pain of realization that now you were gone for good
because i wasn’t fine,
i wasn’t fine,
i wasn’t fine,
i’m still not fine
—phosphenous
