More Lies, More Cameras and Much More Action

Chapter 15

Caspar POV -

After living with Joe for almost 2 years, I'd seen many sides to him. I've seen him angry, like the night he had a stupid argument with Beth, went to a pub then came home completely drunk and smashed a glass against the wall, he wasn't a violent or angry person so it was hard to witness him so distressed. I'd seen Joe laugh and be goofy, be smart and fix things in the apartment when they broke and I've seen him be serious and come up with some of the most intellectual and creative ideas for YouTube.

However, seeing Joe in my arms full of such pain and raw emotion was a completely new experience, one I didn't really know how to handle. Joe had shared some of his pain with me when he came back to England alone but I'd never witnessed anything even close to this before. Sure, I've had girlfriends cry in my arms but that was usually because they broke a nail or ran out of foundation but something must be seriously wrong to get Joe, one of the strongest people I know, into this state.

'Do you want to talk about it buddy?' I asked him once his violent sobbing had calmed down.

'I don't know what to do.' He cried.

'Do about what bro?'

Joe removed himself from my embrace and laid back on the sofa with his feet on the sofa by where I was sat. His eyes were red, reminding me of the time we were in New York 3 years ago and drank so much alcohol and had so little sleep that his eyes were almost the same colour as they were then.

'I've messed up.' He said so bluntly considering the emotion he just poured out to me.

'With what mate?' I asked, keeping my voice soft as possible hoping he'd unload some of his pain and worry onto me.

'Fucking Maddy.' He said angrily before putting his head onto his hands.

'Joe.' I sighed, wondering how best to put this. 'I know it was hard when she left but it's been two years, I don't think she's coming ba-'

'I fucked her Caspar. Last night.' He admitted, shocking me and filling my mind with so many questions. I couldn't work out what to ask first and I knew if I wasn't careful my big mouth would start spilling things I didn't really mean.

'She's back in London for a few days, working for this magazine. That meeting I had with Gleam yesterday, that was introducing me to her because she's writing an article about me.' Joe revealed before I asked, almost like he could see the questions spinning around my mind like cogs in a machine.

'Well that's the ultimate twist of fate.' I sighed, not really knowing what to say.

'Isn't it just.' Joe said, sounding bored and fed up.

'Does Beth know?' I riskily asked, knowing that was the last night he'd want to hear right now.

'Does she fuck.' He sighed. 'This is so fucking messed up, Caspar. I was ready to move on, I was! I finally felt like I could breathe again and accepted the engagement to Beth and her plans of moving in together. It's like she knew, she knew I was finally kind of happy and she's just back to mess with my head and break my heart all over again!'

'Mate, we both know that was never her intentions.' Maddy was a complicated girl, to say the least, when she dated Joe. She was hurt and damaged but her love for Joe was always so genuine, anyone could see that.

'She left me Caspar! She fucking made me get on that plane alone. She promised me that she'd come back and that she'd at least call and she didn't! Two years of nothing Caspar, absoulutely nothing!' Joe shouted, his anger and distress reflecting through his voice. I could see how confused and hurt he was and I hated that there was nothing I could do to help him in this moment.

'I'm sorry mate, I know how hurt you were and I wish I could make it better. Maybe this is your chance to get some closure and put everything into perspective. Have you planned to see her again whilst you're here?'

'Yes, she's coming over tomorrow to write this goddamn article.' He sighed. I felt so much pain for Joe, I just wanted to make everything better for him.

'I think we should just have a nice quiet night in, order a pizza and let me smash your arse on Fifa! Tomorrow is a new day, we'll deal with it when it comes.' I said, more enthusiastically trying to provide a distraction for my friend.

'I wish she'd just stayed gone. I wish she never came back.' He whispered out loud, not to anyone in particular.

I had so many more questions I wanted to ask like how did they get into a situation to have sex? Was it good? What are you going to do about Beth? However, this wasn't about me, this was about Joe and for now I needed to shut my mouth and distract his mind with pizza and video games like any good friend would.