101 Days of Heartbreak Series Book 1: Letters of Heartbreak

Chapter 18

Dear Kamita, 

I had always dealt with confusion the way I knew how--- total avoidance.  

I had always tried to put an indestructible shield over the thoughts and feelings that were threatening to make me go insane and I knew had succeeded. For a while, at least. 

Then you just had to be the exception. Again. 

And just like that, the supposedly indestructible shield instantly became destructible.  

Once again, you had popped out at the right moment when I was at my most sensitive state-- the state where I just wanted to be pathetically dramatic and needy because I wanted to escape the stressful things in my life. You always had the most perfect timing to get through to me; as if you had an Ateera Distress Radar with you. 

Damn you.  

Do you remember my thesis days? 

The batches that had graduated before us were sadistic bastards. 

"Thesis will eat you up alive." 

"When you thought you can graduate because you passed all subjects, you had forgotten there was still the thesis grade too. Nope it didn't happen to me, but who knows it might happen to you." 

"One student died of nervous breakdown during thesis defense." 

"Thesis defense calms your nerves slowly... until you can no longer breathe and just die." 

"My world was bearable--- until my thesis grade." 

"You should have started thinking about your thesis topic since second year! Now you don't have enough time. Are you sure you wanted to graduate? Then you should have known that since the beginning." 

Those were the encouraging words from our seniors. They even had the nerve to set up an Email Group just so they can post such words.  

As if the thesis advisers' reputations weren't enough to send us seniors into thoughts of hell. 

--- 

"You need to find another framework," her thesis adviser said, looking at her thoughtfully with his usual kind eyes. "Show it to me this afternoon and you can have your defense tomorrow. Your framework is acceptable, that's why I had allowed you to proceed, but you need to find a better one or your panel will eat you alive." 

Ateera tried not to show her frustration and just nodded. Her thesis adviser was one of the best yet kindest thesis advisers and she knew it would be unfair to lash out her frustration on him. He's probably the only thesis adviser who would ask her to change the framework at the last minute to fit her thesis and not the other way around.  

She left the Faculty Room with a heavy heart and headed to the library. She didn't have time to wallow in self-pity. She needed to find that framework today.  

Ateera glanced at her watch as she settled on a secluded corner at the Reserved Section-9:00 am. She has eight hours to find that damn framework. 

A few hours later, Ruyu had found her crying silently with a mountain of books surrounding her.  

He's been looking all over for her since he arrived in school, but he got sidetracked when he got into a heated debate with his thesis adviser. Before he knew it, it was almost 4 pm. 

He finally had the chance to worry about his best friend, but then he realized Ateera hasn't answered any of his text messages or calls.  

Upon seeing the state of her best friend right now, he didn't need to hear any words from her. So Ruyu just sat beside her and pulled her into his arms. He knew how she felt.