It's Not Perfect, It's Love - Prinxiety

I'm Sorry

~Thomas's POV~

"Um... Hi guys."

The voice who spoke is soft, full of nervousness and a hint of fear. I haven't heard it for weeks but I know it like I know my mother's. I turn around and see Virgil standing anxiously in the corner. He looks ready to flee at any moment.

I'm not quite sure what to do at this point... What do you say to the person you almost killed? The person who thinks you hate them? How do I convince him that I regret my actions? How do I gain his forgiveness? Why should I? I don't deserve forgiveness. I don't deserve another chance. But he deserves an apology.

"Virgil... I am so sorry." I say.

That's pitiful... I should be on my knees begging him for forgiveness. A forgiveness that I should never receive.

He looks at me. Studies me closely. He has a guarded look in his eyes as he searches mine for any hint of emotion they reveal. I let him see it all. All my regret, my sorrow, my worry. My relief that he's okay and willing to talk to me. My fear that there is no way to fix what I have done. All of it.

I try to search his eyes as well but find nothing. His eyes reveal nothing about what he's feeling right now, and that worries me.

"Why?" He asks, a kind of cautiousness in his voice that says 'I anticipate the worst possible answer to this question'.

"Why what?" I respond confused.

"Why did you do it?" Is all he says in response.

"Honestly? I was tired. Tired of never getting any sleep. Tired of overthinking so much. Tired of analysing every last detail for any kind of ill intent. I was overwhelmed and I wasn't thinking clearly. I never wanted to hurt you. I just wanted a break. I see now how big of a mistake I made and how much I didn't understand about what you did for me. I know this is no excuse. I should never have done that and I don't expect you to forgive me. I've done nothing to deserve it, but I just want you to know how much I regret that. If i could go back in time I never would have done it. I will never be able to convey just how sorry I am but I will do anything to make up for it."

He stares at me. He doesn't say anything and I start to worry that I said the wrong thing. I look over at Roman, who has been silently watching the whole exchange, per Virgil's request. He just shrugs. I look back at Anx to see that he has tears in his eyes. Not a lot, but they're still there.

I'm about to look to Prince for advice when Virgil rushes forward and hugs me. I stand there, shocked, for a second before wrapping my arms around him proactively as he cries into my shirt. We stay like that for a good five minutes before he lets go and takes a couple steps back, wiping tears from his eyes. My shirt has stains from his eyeshadow but I don't care.

"I'm sorry for that..." he says, "God, I'm so pathetic." I'm shocked.

"No, you're not. Please don't ever say that about yourself." I reply.

"Don't expect me to do that again, too much socal interaction.... Look, I'm not ready to go back to normal, but I am ready to make small steps. I... Guess this means I forgive you. Just... Give me time, I still have bad days." he says sheepishly. I notice that he's automatically acting nervous and self-conscious again. I smile at him.

"Take all the time you need, I can wait as long as it takes. I love you Virgil, you're a part of me and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had permanently ruined our relationship. I'll... See you later?"

He looks up at me. I think he almost smiled.

"Yeah... See you later." He then sinks back into the mindscape. I look over at Prince.

"You can go after him, I can tell you're dying to." I say. He blushes and nods in gratitude before sinking down after Anxiety.

This went better than expected.