Aftermath

In The Cold

Loneliness.

You think you know the feeling but you don't until it actually happens to you. True loneliness that stops you mid-step and breaks through your many thoughts. In that moment you realize how lonely you are.

We tend to refer to ourselves as lonely people with no lives. We brag about having little to no friends as if it was something to boast about. Yet we do not truly feel lonely when we do this.

People are always in some way surrounded by something. As children we had parents and siblings, neighbors and relatives. We had pets or books with characters that we connect to.

The day Hestia froze in her spot and had the realization of how truly lonely she was happened winter of her first year at Hogwarts. Her family refused to allow her back home for the holidays, so instead she spent her days leading to Christmas in the library. By the end of the third day during the break she had finished all her homework. She reread all her class books for the year by the end of that week.

Hestia took to a new hobby instead, studying the famous Harry Potter. She found it odd that the special boy was alone at school for the holidays. She knew he was orphaned but had the family he had been raised in been so bad? Did the famous kid have a not so famous life?

Hestia woke up alone on Christmas Day to no presents and no sign of life. The entire common room was deserted. The small eleven year old wandered the school halls as if it were any other day, only remembering it was Christmas when she walked into the lively dining hall.

Taking the seat at the energized table surrounded by other kids joyfully talking about their presents, Hestia forced an almost authentic smile onto her face. She had never received presents for Christmas before, but she was also never forced to be surrounded by those who had. After finishing her breakfast she all but ran back to the Slytherin common room. Still, she did not feel lonely.

She walked into the common room to see her old friend Draco surrounded by mountains of gifts. His face was glowing with happiness. When Hestia entered his silver eyes snapped to her, a devilish grin slathered his face.

"Oh, look who it is. Hestia Blackwell. Gone to cry all by yourself in your room because mommy and daddy don't love you?" He mocked.

Hestia was frozen to her spot with burning tears desperately fighting to be released. She stared at someone that less than a year ago was her only friend but did not recognize him.

"What happened to you?" She whispered softly, her voice cracking as she tried to hold back her tears. "What did I do to make you hate me so much, Draco?"

The boy stared back at her blankly. Then he started to laugh maniacally at her. One that was a mix of genuine and forced humor.

"You're so pathetic! You can't tell me you honestly thought I cared about you. My mother had to pay me to hang out with you because she felt so awful for how pathetic you were."

She knew he didn't mean it. She knew that her parents and his had a falling out at the beginning of the school year. She kept repeating the fact he didn't mean what he said, but no matter how much she told herself that she couldn't come to believe it.

A scolding hot tear fell down her face as her bright blue eyes stared at him. "I'll miss you, Draco Malfoy." The words were so hollow and sorrow-some that even Draco fell silent.

The moment Hestia turned around and took a step in the opposite direction of him was when the feeling hit her. It slammed the air out of her lungs, crushed her bones, and paralyzed her all at the same time. Each step she took she was hit over and over again. The castle was filled with a warmth but a teeth chattering cold washed over her.