CLOSER

19

I enter into the colorful room and the therapist smiles at me.

" A- are y- you Mrs. E- Evans ? "

" Yes and you must be Lucy " Mrs. Evans pulls up a chair for me to sit in and I nod.

The room is silent until Mrs. Evans takes up her papers and reads through them. Once she's done; I look up and She smiles at me. I don't smile back, I just give her a can-we-just-move-on look.

" okay so how are you feeling right now ? " she asks and I shrug.

" I d- d- don't r- really k- know, I'm h- happy with m- my n- new f- family b- but - .. I d- don't k- know  "

" I've heard that you harm yourself .. is that true ? "

I nod, wishing I was at home now.

" Doesn't it hurt ? You don't feel the need to stop ? " she asks with worry in her voice.

" n- no it h- helps m- me c- cope w- with my p- p- problems, and n- no I d- don't f- f- feel t- the need to s- stop " I say feeling ashamed.

" ohh ... well you know what else you can do when you're depressed ? "

I shake my head and wait for her to answer.

" you can get some sunlight, talk to a friend about your problems and try to stay positive. "

" um I- I'll t- try .. " is all I say knowing I'm not going to stop cutting.

" how's school ? " she asks

" it s- sucks .. b- because e- everyone b- b- bullies m- me and t- there's this b- boy t- that I s- started l- liking ... " I look down and stare at the white tiled floor.

" what happened ? " she asks with worry in her voice.

" he k- keeps a- apologizing b- but d- d- does the s- same f- foolishness.. I t- think I l- love him ... I d- don't understand w- w- why t- th- though " I sigh and Mrs. Evans nods.

Its quiet for such a long time now and Mrs. Evans nods, She's probably thinking of why the doctor gave her a suicidal, idiotic teen girl. I know I need help but this isn't helping me, Silence and questions aren't helping me. I'll make everyone happy if I just died, and it's the truth my classmates think I'm crazy. They even told me to die, What's next ?  a group of them are going to try and kill me themselves.

" I t- think our t- time i- is u- u- up .. " I say as I get up and Mrs. Evans nods. As I walk out the building, I think to myself ' why're these people joking with me, They know I need help but refuse to actually help me. ' I start to cry and while walking up the block towards my house, I meet Cody along the way.

" Hi Lucy " he smiles a little and then stops when he notices that I'm crying.

" Lucy, What's the matter ? Who hurt you ? " he looks at me caresses my face.

" C- Cody m- move ... " I cry out

" Lucy . Who hurt you ?! "

" no one .. m- my d- doctor s- sent me t- to t- this t- therapist n- named Mrs. E- Evans .. " I say

" Mrs. Evans ! " he yells out and I raise my eyebrow.

" y- you k- know her ? "

" yes when my father died I was struggling with depression, he was like a best friend before Zachary and Amanda came. My doctor sent me to Evans and she didn't help at all. Then a few months after I found out that she was a fraud.. she's not a real therapist .. " he says and droops his head down.

My eyes get real wide.

" look, Lucy I'm truly sorry .. for what I said and for what I've done.. no kylie and I aren't dating.. nor will we ever. I just screwed up and forgot about you .. and I'm sorry. "

" o- oh .. um its o- o- okay. " I say hoping that he'll keep his promise.

" Lucy it's getting cold and late, I'll walk you home " Cody takes off his sweater and covers me with it.

" T- thank y- you .. " I say and Cody smiles.

" no problem at all, Lucy " he says

We pass by Cody's best friends and Kylie.

" haha you're with that slut " Amanda yells

" Cody, Why're you walking this bitch home ? " Kylie yells and Zachary laughs.

" She's not a bitch nor a slut, so shut the hell up ! " Cody yells back.

" if you hang with her, you can't hang with us " Zachary says.

" I'm fine with that, Lucy means everything to me right now " Cody responds and I blush.

" that ugly bitch.. tsk tsk " Kylie says and they leave.

" Lucy you don't have to worry about them anymore, Vanessa and I are here for you "