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Adelaine Colbert, a seventeen-year-old college dropout, family failure and socially awkward. After dropping out of college and destroying her parents' dreams and ambitions she has a plan. Get a job...
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"Because I have known despair, I value hope. Because I have tasted frustration, I value hope. Because I have been lonely, I value love." - Leonard Nimoy
Walking back home, alone in the dark, upset and completely and utterly mortified was most definitely one of the things that was not listed for my agenda for the day. In fact, it isn't listed on any of my agendas for my future days, most definitely not. That was one thing I was sure about which seemed to be a surprise to me since everything I have ever thought and have felt has been a blur. Especially since my feelings have always been a large question mark in my life.
My feet stomped into the puddles that had now made their way onto the surface as I walked, every so often a kick was thrown angrily in the direction of the water, splashing it everywhere. Including me, of course. Perhaps the rage of royally screwing up something that had seemed to be going well had hit me, or maybe the mortification of my sudden burst of panic and fright in front of the two, either way, the latter made me angrier than ever.
It almost felt like a time ticking bomb or some kind of explosive had been planted in my heart, as it slowly ticked loudly in my mind and banged inside my ribcage, fading out all the background noises I had previously heard. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't stop it, I couldn't plead for it to stop, I couldn't do anything but stay silent and listen to the echoes of my future destructions. Seems to be a common sequence that even staying silent and being opinionless has a impact on my life, a negative one as usual.
With every small, slow and exhausted step I took it almost felt like a stab to the heart of some sort. A painful reaction, a feeling perhaps. I gasp as if walking a marathon as I sudden notice the familiar mountain I had been edging towards for what felt like hours. A mountain beside the beach, close enough to grandfather's home, just a couple of minutes away, in fact.
When I had discovered the area where the mountain laid undercover I had been amazed at what beauty life could really hold. Just sitting on that mountain, in the fresh breeze of the winter air mixed with the sandy beaches and the full view of the night sky was just about enough to change anybody's view of life, even if it was for a couple of minutes. The stars that scattered the midnight sky or the sound of the trees whistling in the wind was just enough for my eyes to see everything from a whole other point of view, a whole other level. A level where you are unable to see the bad things happening across the world, a level where you can be fully absorbed by nature's beauty that had been undercover beneath all the awful things we see on a daily basis which covered our eyes for what seems like years, a level where everything is different.
