A secret untold. ( l.s )

Chapter Twelve . ( Greif. )

HARRY'S POV.

I never really understood grieving as a child, I mean yeah, its sad because you lost someone you loved, but I just couldn't wrap my head around it .

I remember once my aunt died, when I was about 4 & when we went to the funeral everyone was crying & I couldn't understand why, but eventually I just started crying, not because I was sad, but because I was confused as why everyone else was.

But, now I understand. Its a terrible process to go through & I'm just in the beginning stages. I just have this heavy weight of guilt on my shoulders, that I can't seem to brush off.

Its my fault, I know it is & no one is going to make me believe otherwise. A part of me makes me want to blame Louis because he's the one who kissed me & quite frankly, I'm believing it.

I was so caught up in my thoughts, that I hadn't noticed Louis leaning on my door frame. I gave him a sour look.

"May I help you?" I grumbled , the sour look not leaving my face. Louis looked hurt & that's just what I wanted. He should feel ashamed for kissing me.

"Just .. was wondering if you're ok." He said softly, his tone low & calm.

"Well, let's see, my girlfriend is dead all because you kissed me, hmm. I'm perfectly fine." I snapped, grinning harshly.

Louis looked started at my sudden disgust of him. Well what did he expect.

Louis opened his mouth, as if he was going to say something, but he never did, instead he turned away & slammed the door in a swift move.

"Thank god he left." I said loud enough so Louis would here. I heard him slide down my door & he tried muffling his sobs.

I sighed & got up & opened the door, Louis looked up at me, his face swollen & red.

Instead of saying something I brushed past him & walked down stairs, grabbing a bottle of vodka, before heading back up.

Tonight I wanted to drown all my pains & this is the only way to do that, well the only way to do it with Louis in the house.

When I got back upstairs, Louis had moved from my door & chuckled at how frightened he had looked.

I sat on my bad & took a long gulp of the vodka . That night I drank my pain away, as I said I did.

After every bottle , I'd grab another & swallow it down, smashing each bottle to the ground, tears soaking my face.

The pain may have been gone, but the memories weren't.

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So, I updated. yay. Haha, hope you like it. Its short, but gets to the point. -C.

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