Twila The Girl Who Waz In Luv With A Vampyre (with commentary!)

Chapter 6: BOMBARDED (Trigger Warning)

[MN: Sup, everybody! Welcome back to the commentary! Picking up where we left behind, Twila meets a vampire slayer and gets pregnant! Warning: May trigger some readers]

Chapter 6 - A life dats so demanding

A/N: ok u noe wat prepz? im gong 2 rite mi stori betta so u guyz kan stup complaning abot chatzpeek. [MN: I do bet it's gonna be worse than you think, author!] SO NOW U WILL HAV NOTHING 2 FLAMM ABOT HA HA. [MN: Man, are you crazy? Besides, flamers may show up whether you like it or not!] nd btw stopp tellin me 2 use spellchek, becuz im using notpad nd it dosnt have it ok! [MN: Ugh, grammar nazis. If you used an iPhone, it'd correct every spelling error you've made.] midnite fanx for da good reveiws, n every1 else hu gav me good reveiws, u guyz rokk! TATA GLIESBIE I LUV U! [MN: Hey, she just revealed her identity to the public or whatever!] PREPZ STUP FLAMMING!1 GOTHZ ROCK 666 [MN: All the world's a stage and the goths, er, goffs are the good guys; the preps are flamers and the bad guys.]

CHAPTER 6

XXX CONTINUD FROM DA LAST CHAPTER XXX

When I woke up Deward was over me. [MN: Hey, she resurrected! Did Edward help her or did she use a toy knife to commit suicide? Or did she fake her own suicide? BTW, Deward is a nice name. It's better than Edward!] "Twilla. TWILA!" he screwed into my ear. [MN: Putting a screwdriver into the ear is painful than screaming at it.] "Youre going to be ok." 

My long strait hair was all around me, I was laying on the flor. I was wearing a black spagitti strap shirt with a matching sweatshirt over it nd a blak jean skirt with MCR pins on it. I had on ripped fishnets and blak highheels that had spikes coming out of them. [MN: Hold on a second. How'd she change her clothes? Is it magic or did someone else change them?] There were bandagez all over my arms and body were I cut myself. You could c the blood coming thru. [MN: Gross, man, gross! *blech*]

"Just fukk off ok?" I said with a sad smile and I storted to cry. [MN: With tears of blood, of course.] He tried 2 comfort me. [MN: There. There.] He had his bronz hair in spikes with purple steaks [MN: Purple steaks? Yum!] in it and he had on white fondation on his sexah face. [MN: I didn't know he's fond of the color white. He thinks it's sexy.] There were tears raining down from his topaz eyes. [MN: Still more man tears? Here, have a hanky, Edward.] "No plese tell me y you did this." He shooted.

"I dont want to effing talk abot it ok can you just bakk the fuk off!" I was so depressed. [MN: Being depressed after a suicide attempt isn't gonna work, Twila! Move on!] I got up off the floor and tried 2 run out the door but Edward stopped me. [MN: Going somewhere, Twila?] "WAIT!" he whimspered. "There is some1 waiting for you out there, itz not safe." [MN: I hope it's dangerous for her!] His voice got all low and hott like a male version of Amy Lee in the begining of Goin Under. [MN: Or he went all serious! He'd be all like, "Twila, I am disappoint."]

"But I really need too talk to you." I begged pleasingly. [MN: Trying to please him, Twila?] "Lissen, I cant stay in dis school anymore." [MN: "Because they said so!"]

"WE CAN TALK LATER, WATCH OUT, SHEZ ABOUT TO BREAK DOWN THE DOOR!" [MN: On that day, vampirekind received a grim reminder. It lived in fear on whatever was gonna break through the door.] Suddenly I turned around and the door smashed down. It was .. ... BUFFI THE VAMPIR SLAYER!  [MN: What a nice surprise, er, guest appearance you've made in this chapter, Buffy! Come on in!] (a/n fanx for da sugestion! 666 XXX)

"Ahahaha, dont even bother," she said meanly. "You cant escape from me Twila Beatiful Psyco Topaz Sad'ness Cullen." [MN: Her name's now Twila Beatiful Psyco Topaz Sad'ness Cullen! That's strange. It kinda reminds me of Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. BTW, is that even a nickname?]

But I was to angry to even c her. [MN: You should get angry at Cher instead.] "You now what Edword, u never pay attencion to me. Why dont you just go to Emett, so you guys can screw? Becuz you obviously dont care abot me." [MN: All I wanna say they don't really care about Buffy!] "NO PLEASE" he got down on his knees with dark tearz of sorrow. "Give me another chance" [MN: I'm sure she'll kill you, Edward. Don't listen to her.]

"Do you remebr what I said that nite." He lookd at me all confused and sad, and Buffie started 2 take out her sword. [MN: Warrior Mode activated!] "I SED ONE MORE CHANCE AND I MEANT IT NOW YOU CAN JUST GET THE FUKK OUT OF MI LIFE BECAUSE YOU ONLY HURT ME." [MN: Edward: I am the great Edwardholio! Are you threatening me?]

I took off da pentargram he had gotten me nd just before I was about to throw it out the window he ran over and hugged me and startd 2 sing "Cruxifiction in Space" by Marlin Manson. [MN: It could've been better if it were a cross!] Dat song was so touching and I had to forgiv him. [MN: Really...]

"Excus me were were we?" laughed Buffie da Vampir Slayer looking at us. [MN: Were were were? Werewolf?] "Look if u dont get out of here, i am gong to post dese pictures of u screwing Angell on the internet!" I shooted. [MN: Shame on you, Buffy. Shame on you.] She got scared becaus she didnt want 2 end up like that prep Pares Hilton. [MN: Actually, she's an alumna of Mount Saint Prepz Academy, so that means she's a FUCKING. PREP!]

A lot of other stuff happened nd then Edword went home, we were still marred. [MN: Still nice!] But I didnt get 2 talk 2 him abot transferring. I went home n listened to Panic At Da Disko and put on a blak nitegown nd put my hare up [MN: It's best if you had a pet hare. Hope it doesn't bite.] in a blakk skull clip. I went 2 take a bathe but when I went to da tub [MN: Going to the bath with your clothes on?] I saw. ... Edard! [MN: If I were you, Twila, I'd tell him to stay out of the bathroom, 'cause I'm naked!]

"How did u get in here?" I asked shockly with anger. [MN: You mean "shockingly?"]  "I transported n, I have telekinisis." (a/n LIKE VOLXEMORT FROM MY IMMORTAL LOL.) [MN: Wait a minute, how can you teleport if you have telekinesis?]

So we took off our cloths nd you guyz can guess what we did (yea u pervs get ur mindz out of the glutter.) [MN: You had a thing! Oh my!] The next morning I woke up and I COULDNT BELEVE IT.

"OMFG ED WAKE UP RITE NOW." I scremed. He drove over 2 my house to see what waz wrong. "IM PREGGANT." I was crying. [MN: WHAT? YOU GOT PREGGERS AFTER HAVING THE THING? THIS IS UNREAL, PEOPLE! BTW, It reminds me of a horrible Jesla fanfic I read a few years ago on Facebook! Whatever. Let's continue.] I started 2 kut my rists over the bandages with a razor. [MN: Being pregnant doesn't mean you have to slit your wrists, but learning how to be a responsible mother, Twila!] Just then da fone rang, it was the principal saying "Twola, ur going to be late for ur first day at Mount Saint Prepz Acadamy." [MN: OH NO!!! *dies anyway*]

"THATZ IT THIS COULDNT BE ANY WORSE." I flew in2 my bed and kept crying nd my pillow turned red nd black with makup and blood. [MN: That would be gross and bad for the pillow. If it were alive, it'd go to the bathroom, er, the wash to take a bath!]

"YOURE GOING 2 MOUNT SAINT PREPZ ACADAMY?" EDWARD YELLED. [MN: At least she didn't realize or whatever!] "I WAS TRYING TO TELL U THAT LAST NIGHT YOU IDIOTIC AIDS!" [MN: I hope the folks at Mount Saint Prepz Academy all have AIDS. Or at least some or many of them.]

I culdnt take it, my life was absolutely terrible and I had nofing left to live for. [MN: Yes, it is. Some people live more happier lives than you, Twila! So shut up and enjoy life the way it is!] Edword tried 2 calm down and hug me but I punched him away. [MN: Edward be like, "Here, have a hug." Then Twila's all like, "WHATTHEHELLAREYOUDOINGANYWAY?" and punches him anyway.]

"Please itll be ok." He pormised. [MN: Twila, please move on. I know there are lots of people who love you.] But I didnt believe it.  I just wanted 2 watch Da Ring nd overdosse with aspirin and pot. [MN: So you wanted to commit suicide while watching a horror movie, huh? I bet you'll miss some of its remaining minutes, 'cause you're dead! Wait a sec, CAN AN OVERDOSE KILL A VAMPIRE?] So I storted to sing How Could This Happen 2 Me by smipple plan. [MN: The perfect song for this scene! Hit it!] Ed weeped and weeped (a/n if u dont luv sensiteve guyz den fukk off!) [MN: Sob, sob] nd I fell asleep having nitemares abot prepz and babiez. [MN: Good luck giving birth in front of those merciless preppy creatures!]

XXXXXXXXXXX END CHAPTER 5 XXXXXXXXXXXXXX [MN: IT'S ACTUALLY CHAPTER 6, SICKO!]

lol I BET U DINT EXPECT DAT WELL U WILL HAVE 2 WATE ND C WAT HAPPENZ. [MN: All right then. All's well that ends well. See you next chapter!]