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chapter 22 *ೃ

Kiara

I posted my poems in my accounts, I feel like maybe it will going to inspire other people even tho, I'm irrelevant. as I was making new poem, the thoughs of Jacob was there again

"the more you hate, the more you love"
(by: ksrspoems)

when I saw you, I zone out
when I talked to you, I almost pass out
when you smiled, I wanted to fly,
but when you hated me, I wanted to die

everyday and every night
it feels like a nightmare right?
How come you hated me that much?
I was just asking you but is that too much?

every time your glance land on me
I just want the beast to go and get me
I wanted to hide because of you
but I lied, because I wanted to be with you

those nights that I was lonely
while you were sleeping peacefully
while I was overthinking, how lovely!
but then again, we hated each other truly.

another time with my favorite place
you were enjoying while I can't even face
the more you go there I overthink
the more I seems to sink

but you hugged me
I felt safe, how could that be?
I felt love but we hated each other, am I wrong?
the more you hate, the more you love, and that game was so strong.

did I really caught feelings for Jacob?

oh, I forgot to say, I changed my username in all my accounts to ksrspoems (kiara summereign sprouse),  I wanted myself to be anonymous, I don't want people to know who I am, I hate being judged.

I'm not going to post pictures of mine, maybe one day I will expose myself. but I wanted to help people, inspired them. without knowing who am I, or where I lived. I don't want people to think that I'm doing everything for money or fame, well I know that's not gonna happen but I really wanted to inspire people while I'm being a good Samaritan.

"Kiara, let's go eat" I heard Camilla says

I ran downstairs and look at the foods

"well, I guess I'll get fat" I say as I sit down and started shoving different kinds of food inside my mouth, delicious!

"are you ready to see your family Kiara?" auntie Diana says as I shrugged being stuck with 'I miss them' and 'I'm scared to see them'

I'm scared, I don't know why but I am really scared.

I'm afraid to see the family I ruined, the happy family that was now all broke.

I don't know how to feel at all, I don't know how to act.

"Kiara, we're here" I heard my father's voice.

that's when

I freeze

Landon

when we reach the house, my Palm become as sweaty as you can imagine, the fact that I'm gonna see my twin again making me so damn nervous and hide at the same time.

a lot of things will going to change, a lot of things will never be as the same as before.

"Kiara we're here" my dad says as we saw Kiara eating

she didn't move, she didn't say anything, she didn't look at us. she never show emotion at all

and thats when I know she ran and she went upstairs.

my auntie Diana sigh and welcome us together with her bestfriend

"give her some time" auntie Diana says as my mom and dad nodded

I can see my family craving for Kiara's hug, and I can't help but to feel the same thing

"Landon, would you want to talk to her?" Camilla says as I eagerly nod my head and she walked me to Kiara's bedroom

I went to knock on her door, I got no response, so I invited myself in

"please don't hurt me" she cries then  pleaded, hiding to her blanket

I couldn't move, my tears went down, she probably have a trauma now and it's killing me

"Kiara, I won't" I say and hug her

she didn't response or hugged back

she was sobbing

"I'm sorry Kiara" I apologize

"I'm really really sorry" I say as I hugged her tighter

"can you please leave, I want to be alone for a while. please" she says almost a whisper

"okay, I'm sorry" I say as I leave

I'm really sorry

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I hate my life, you all be active please

-a♡
{9.25.17}