Floral & Fading (Perrentes M-Preg)

Chapter Fourteen

Dec 26th, 2012

Slowly my eyes open and I take in a shuddering breath. Pain runs up and down my side and I yelp loudly. A loud whimper leaves me and tears spring to my eyes as I get my breathing under control and pry my eyes open. Bright lights burn my eyes making me blink over and over till I look around and see the heart monitor letting out a constant beep. My eyes go wide and I look around quickly. My heart monitor starts to spark and a nurse walks in and sees me

She rushed over to me then looks me over. "Tony please take some deep breaths. We have a lot to talk about and your child is already in a very fragile state. If you stress yourself too much the chance of you losing the baby is very high." she says and I start to take deep breaths calming myself down. She smiles and nods her head then pats my arm lightly. "Good job. Now I'm going to get you a drink of water," she says and I nod my head.

The nurse walks away from me and walks out the room. Slowly and achingly I lift my hand and place it on my stomach. "I'm so sorry little thing." I think to myself and gulp then sigh and look over to my side. I see a human sitting on the couch and I squint then see it's Kellin. I pick up the pillow and throw it at him.

It didn't quite go very far but it hit him. He jumps up and looks around. He sees me and his eyes go wide when he rushes over to me. "Oh thank god you're awake Tony. Mike has been freaking out but since he can't get off the bed he can't come see you so he's having a heart attack over if you and the kids are okay." he rambles then I glare at him and he just looks me over. "What? What did I do?" he asks.

"He can't talk right now. He hasn't had water in like 15 hours and hasn't talked at all." the nurse says and I look over at her. She hands me a cup of water and I drink it down quickly. I look at them both then take a deep breath. "What happened and where is Mike?" I ask Kellin grabs my hand.

"From what Mike said there was a car that spun out and hit you. You didn't have your seatbelt on and you went through the windshield cracking the top of your head open and pretty much almost killing you. Mike has a few broken bones but he's okay." he says and I nod then the nurse clears her throat.

"Dr. Roseland also needs to talk to you about your child. They're bringing Mike in, in a few minutes and you're gonna have to have a very long talk," she says and I gulp then nod my head. A very long talk about what? Kellin's grip gets tighter on my hand and I look over at him. He reaches up and moves my hair out of my face and smiles slightly.

"Am I going to lose my baby?" I whisper and he takes in a deep breath.

"I don't know Tony," he says and tears come to my head but I push them down and clench my jaw. I place my hand on my stomach and look at it. I just sit there and look at my stomach. Time passes slower and slower. My stomach becomes the only thing I can see clearly and the rising feeling of fear and anger overwhelms me.

I'm petrified that I'm going to lose my child but at the same time I'm so angry at myself for not wearing a seatbelt. I put myself and my child in danger with not buckling up once. "Fuck," I say then shake my head and look at the ceiling. I'm pretty sure Kellin left but I don't care enough to look and check. "I'm sorry," I whisper and rub my stomach slowly as the white ceiling mocks me.

After a while my vision gets blurry and I'm about to fall asleep till I hear a knock on my door. I look over to the door and see Mike in a wheelchair being pushed by Dr. Roseland. He smiles at me and I hold my arms out for me. He takes control of the wheelchair and makes his way to me. Quickly he grabs my hand and kisses it over and over again. "I'm so sorry Tony," he says and tears come to my eyes.

I place my hand on his cheek then look at Dr. Roseland. "The nurse said we need to have a long talk. Does that mean I'm going to lose my baby?" I ask and she sighs then walks over to me and sits down.

"Right now no. That little one in there is very strong and holding on tight. The fact is.... With this accident, it became clear that there is a high chance of you not making it through the pregnancy. With you being a male there are problems with you carrying a child like we talked about. It is up to you and Mike but you have to know there is a higher chance of you dying because of labor than most pregnancies." she says and I nod my head.

"That doesn't mean you're going to die. It means that you have to give your all and take it easy during this pregnancy. NO heavy lifting, no eating tons and tons of junk food. You have to try." she says and I smile.

"I'll do more than try," I say then she smiles. I look over at Mike and he's just looking at the wall with a blank stare. I sigh then shake my head and look at Dr. Roseland. "Are we having a scan today?" I ask and she shakes her head.

"No. I did earlier. The kid is alright. Right now you two needs to talk. I'll be back later." she says and I nod my head. I watch her leave the room then look at Mike and run my thumb over his jaw. He looks up at me then leaned over slightly and presses a kiss to my lips. I kiss him back then pull away and look him in the eyes.

"What are you thinking? I whisper and he sighs.

"I'm afraid. What if I lose you Tony?" he asks and I take a deep breath then grab his hand and put it on my stomach.

"Then you raise our kid letting he/she know that it isn't their fault and that I love them," I say and he glares then shakes his head.

"What about me?" he asks and I sigh.

"You remember the first night we got together. You remember the years of us being in the band and you remember that I don't regret a single thing we've ever done." I say and tears come to Mike's eyes. He nods his head then looks away. I cup his face in my hand and he looks at me and I smile. "I'm not dying. I'm raising our son or our daughter but if I'm wrong you take care of him or her. Don't go back to whiskey hands and pot." I say and he nods his head.

He smiles then kisses my hand. "You're not going anywhere, Tony Perry."