It's my graduation day, finally, but Taehyung couldn't make it. He's been out of town since Monday. We talked about it and I said that it was fine. We can always celebrate when he comes back. It wasn't a big deal then, however , now, I feel like taking my words back. I felt left out as other people had their families and friends around to congratulate them, give them flowers and take pictures with them. While my family, they don't even know if I'm still alive nor did they even care to find out. Maybe they thought it was good riddance. I wasn't a good daughter to them. Maybe they thought me running away was getting one less mouth to feed. It hurt thinking about the family I used to have but I don't regret leaving.
A few classmates came to me and told me a quick congratulations which I gladly returned before they came back to their families again. I have friends but they were the girls I used to work with. Now I rarely talked to them. We have our own lives now and I am out of that circle so I'm afraid I couldn't relate to them anymore if I ask them to hang out sometimes.
I was standing there alone as I stared ahead in the middle of the grand auditorium where our graduation ceremony was held, when out of nowhere, Byeol's face flashed in my mind. His smile. He would be proud to see me today. I tilted my head back and sniffled as I prevented a tear from falling from my eyes. It's too early for my make up to be ruined and I don't want all these people to see me cry. I'm ugly when I cry but I couldn't stop. My shoulders trembled hard from my attempt to cry out loud. However, it's no use. My tears are already a downpour as memories of Byeol flooded my thoughts. I let my hands wipe my tears as I sobbed and talked to myself, "Oh God, stop. I'm ruining my make up. No. Today is a happy day. I'm not supposed to cry."
Still, I couldn't stop the feelings in my chest from bursting out. I was about to leave, shying away from the crowd to go somewhere where I can cry - preferably inside the toilet cubicle. Then a hand intertwined with mine and I instinctively looked up to the person beside me.
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His smile faded as soon as he saw my tear stricken face. I bit my lip, trying hard to stop my lips from quivering and when I couldn't, I locked my arms around his torso and sobbed on his shoulder while gripping on his shirt. "S-Sorry.. I'm ruining your shirt. It looks expensive. Sorry."
"No baby, it's fine. What happened?" Taehyung softly asked as he pulled me closer, hugging me back and gently caressed my hair. "I was supposed to surprise you but my plan backfired and I was the one who ended up being surprised. So much for plans."
He laughed as I calmed down, separating myself from him. Finally, I see his face through my wet lashes. "How can you smile when I'm crying? I hate you. You lied to me. You said you can't make it and that's why I cried. I felt terrible seeing my classmates with their families while I'm here, alone. Without you. Without Byeol. I miss him so much."
Taehyung's expression softened and he rested his hand on the back of my head, pulling me close to plant a brief kiss against my temples. He spoke to my ear, "He's happy looking after you. I know he is."
