Dear Daddy....

It's not always the Sky that is always Blue

March 25,2006

Dear Mom and Dad,

I am so so sad. The coffins, they are so ugly, it scares me.

Mom, Dad...I really really hate everyone right now. I always hear how sorry they are for me. And how they keep on saying that the man in yellow is only my imagination. It's not! Even Joe doesn't believe me. Only Iris does. I know what I saw! I don't need their pity. I only need you, Mom and Dad. Please... If I am going to be good boy and study harder, are you going to wake up? And we will be together again?

I am so confused. I don't know what to do. Please come back. Wake up. Don't you feel uncomfortable in there? I love the both of you so much. I am so afraid. Come back. Come back.

Please....Mom....Dad....I can't live without you. Please. I can't take this anymore. I love you both so much that it hurts.

I can't breathe.

Love,
Barry

June 5,2006

Dear Mom and Dad,

Sorry. I am so so sorry, if I haven't paid you a visit. I am still scared. I can't sleep properly every night. The man in yellow still scares me every time I close my eyes.

I always sleep on the couch at Joe's house. Hugging your photo and my stuffed toy, it gives me comfort. One night I woke up and Iris is hugging me and singing a lullaby, she said that I was screaming and crying calling out to you.

I hate Joe for forcing me to go to Doctor Emma. I am not sick. I am not!

Mom...Dad...is it okay for Uncle Antoine and Auntie Lilian to adopt me and change my name? They will bring me somewhere far away and they want me to call them Mama and Papa, I am a Big Brother now too. Won't you get mad? Is it alright? They said we will go to France. I will study there. Sorry that I stopped going to school. I am so afraid of the bullies, they hurt me so bad especially Tony Woodward. I always run, but I was always caught up in the corner. They love hurting me. If Iris hasn't found me, I am with you now. Isn't that better?

They want to change my name to Sebastian. Is it okay?

Is this new life? Will I be a different person too? I will be missing you so much. Iris and Joe will take care of you, while I am gone. I promise I will be back. I just want to go somewhere new. We will be leaving 2 days from now.

I love you so much Mom and Dad. So so much that it's still hurts.

Love,
Barry

June 7,2006

Dear Joe and Iris,

When you find this letter, it means that I am gone. Flying to France.

Joe, I am so sorry for not talking to you for how many months. I feel so sad and angry when you forced me to see a Doctor. But still I am sorry for treating you that way. I now understand how you are worried about me and loved me like your own son. I will make it up to you, when I get back. I want you to know that I love you like my own Dad. I hope you forgive me for everything.

Iris, to my big sister. I am sorry for hurting you sometimes, for pushing you away. But I appreciate your lullabies to me every night when I am scared and crying nonstop. I will sing a song for you, once I get back. I love you.

Please take care of my Mom and Dad for me. Please.

Thank you for everything.

Love,
Barry