Better Left Unsaid

12

Silence always spoke louder than they ever could. It's the silence that gave them the freedom to share anything. Whether that be anger or fear or hope. Silence was a freedom they abused. Becoming masters in the art of reading one another.

It had his heart swelling with guilt. Guilt that he couldn't do much about the look of distress in the other. Guilt that he was the cause of that distress. He knew full well that no matter what he said, it wouldn't change the situation, it wouldn't change time. But it was worst trying to just remind him of the one consistent thing between them.

He heart only swelled more when relief shined in those fiery amber eyes. He swallowed, swallowing any fear down.

"I promise, we'll get through this." He whispered, trying his best to keep his voice steady. "We still have time, whether we do today whenever else doesn't matter. We have time now."

"It will never be enough."

"I know."

"Victor." Smaller hands landed on his own. "I'm tired of all this."

"I know, it's tiring and irritating-"

"We can't keep avoiding it."

"I know that-"

"Then why have we been avoiding it? We're tiptoeing around it as if it were a child's simple secret." Irritation flashed onto Heine's eyes. "It's not simple. We can't keep avoiding this, Victor."

"I know all that."

"Then why have we not done anything?"  

"Because I'm afraid of what could happen, Heine."

"That's a stupid excuse."

"It's not an excuse."

"Is me or yourself that you're trying to convince?" Amber eyes stared him down. His heart grew fast in tgw oncoming anxiety. Heine's hands grabbed onto his and pulled them away from his face. "I know all this too. I know the anxiety and pressure you have. And I'm losing you to it."

"Heine..." Victor's stomach twisted with anxiety. His heart beat faster.

"I'm simply tired of all this, Victor." The smaller hands that gripped his tightened. "It's an endless loop. Why can't we just tell them or at least do something?"

"Because there's so little we can do. We're stuck, Heine."

"We're only stuck if we don't choose already and we only have two options here."

"What do you mean two?"

"We either tell them or we put a stop to this relationship."

For a second, his heart stopped.

~

"God, I'm tired, all this studying is really draining me." Leo whined.

"You did one math problem." Bruno frowned.

"That's one more than last time though!" Leo fullheartedly smiled.

"How the hell does Master deal with you, it's obsurd...?"

"It's pretty easy Bruno." Leo leaned back in his chair, tipping it slightly. "He doesn't have your attitude."

"What exactly is my attitude?" Bruno raised a brow.

"Certified smartass!" Licht added in from across the room.

"What he said." What does that mean? Ran through Leo's head.

"I am thoroughly offended!" Bruno scoffed.

"I am thoroughly bored!" Licht shot back as he stood and slammed his book closed. "Let's do something fun." Mischief shined on his face as he approached the two. "Let's go mess with Heine!"

"That is exactly what we vowed not to do!" Bruno protested.

"What I mean is that we should go cheer him up. He seemed a little sad when he left."

"Oh."

"I don't see a problem with that." Leo agreed. "What do you think Kai?" He looked over at his brother who was laying on the nearby sofa. He got a grunt of approval in response.

"Then it's settled." Licht smiled wide, mischief clear as ever. "We're cheering Heine up!"

~

There was a numbness to being locked in the cellar. Perhaps he was going insane, perhaps it was the reason for him being there that caused the numbness. Who knew.

There wasn't really much of a difference from his regular life. Just more food if any at all. He never thought about the food though. He was always thinking though.

He could have been thinking about all the other children like him. But he wasn't worried much about that, they could adjust. One of them being arrested was a near regular occurrence.
He could have been thinking about he ruined the festival but that'd be stupid.

All he could think of was Victor. Every moment with him, everything Victor gave him, everything. He focused most on that final moment. The blame was fully on him. And he did blame himself. How could he not? He grew numb to that guilt that nagged at him. 

How long had it been? Weeks? Months? He lost track. The sun to moon light cycle put him in a trance. The sounds of rain like the occasional song. He stared at the window as he leaned on the wall. The sun shining down in the middle of the dirty cell. He was cold. It was cold outside today. His thin body couldn't really make much warmth for him. He was reluctant to move but the sun seemed like the perfect way to warm up. 

He was slow to uncurl himself to move. He slowly crawled to the middle of the room where the spot lay. As soon as he touched the spot where the sun hit, he noticed it was a lot warmer than his other spot. He sighed, and curled up there. The sun was bright in his eyes. He stared at it though, more squinting. He stared for a long moment. Silence passed in that long moment. His mind going mute. 

Suddenly, a flapping noise had him blinking and a shadow of a bird covered the sun. He squinted again to see what kind. It took time but his eyes went wide.

A dove. 

He licked his dry lips, and without a though uncurled himself. He shifted so he was on knees. His eyes stayed on the dove. He never really prayed. Never thought about it. He was nihilistic without really caring. 

Now though, this was important. This was the last place he could turn to. For Victor.

Save him.