Hey, Comrade

8

< 8 - восемь >

It's next Wednesday when I am given the okay to go home. The thing I wanted most was a bloody shower where I could wash my hair. I couldn't lift my arms up past my shoulders and although I was offered help by the nurse, I didn't really want her helping me shower.

Dimitri spent all day with me on Sunday, well the ten hours visiting restrictions allowed, and even missed out on his churchly ritual to do so. My mother visited again and even Abe made an appearance. 

It's late in night when we get back to Dimitri's room, due to a problem with my medication, so no one is walking around outside. Im glad though, I look like shit.

Dimitri places my bag on the ground and I walk into the bathroom excited for my shower. It takes me the removal of my pants to realise that I can't even lift up my own shirt. 

"Dimitri?" I call softly.

I hear the rummaging in the room stop and he sticks his head in the door. "Yeah?"

I motioned to my shirt, blush spreading across my face. "I can't do it."

Dimitri smirked. "Are you asking me to undress you Roza?" 

"And if you could also help me shower that would be great too." I smile. He shakes his head and comes forward before lifting up my shirt. I wasn't wearing a bra and as my shirt slips off I'm fully naked. Dimitri's face falls as he looks at me up and down as if it hurts him to do so. "Oh Rose."

My stomach has more bruises than skin showing and I have a bandage covering the space below my bellybutton where I had the appendix operation. My arms and back also have bruises and my wrist is wrapped in a bandage as I didn't need any plaster.

I poke Dimitri in the stomach "Stop it. Im fine, its all bruising and that isn't anything new."

We always had bruises from training, fighting and well sometimes from intimate moments. I remember having fingerprint bruises on the ridges of my hips after a particularly heated night with Dimitri and I.

He sighs and runs a hand through his hair, his eyes still glued to my stomach. "I know but this is different. I have never seen anything this bad."

I poke him again, harder and give him a look. "Are you calling me ugly Comrade?"

Dimitri's mouth twitches in response and his eyes raise a little higher from my stomach and then to my face. "You could never be ugly."

"Mmmhmm." I say and open the door of the shower and turn on the water. Dimitri helps me wash my body, something he probably enjoyed a little to much, and washed my hair. He goes to turn off the water after rinsing the conditioner out, but I shake my head, telling him I want to stay in the water for a bit. He nods and kisses me before leaving.

I stand letting the water drip over me with my eyes closed for a long time, so long that my fingers turn into prunes. When I finally step out of the shower I see clothes stacked on the counter for me to wear. I didn't even notice that Dimitri had come in again.

I dry my body easy enough, having to skip on towel drying my hair and leaving it at an uncomfortable dripping wet state and get dressed with mild to moderate difficultly. Dimitri brought his grey shirt I always liked to wear, my underwear and some pants. I leave the pants and walk out of the bathroom. The shirt was big enough to be a dress, coming just above mid thigh.

Dimitri is lying half on the bed, his legs off the bed. He isn't even reading, just staring at the roof. He sits up when I walk in and pats on his legs for me to sit on them. I do and want badly to wrap my hands around his neck and through his hair, but I cant so I settle for resting them on his stomach. 

My wet hair drips on my lap and Dimitri pushes the strands behind my shoulder to rest on my back before his hands wrap themselves around my waist. 

We sit silently, no one knowing what to say so in true Rose Hathaway fashion I blurt out the first thing that comes into my mind. "So apparently we can have children now."

"Yes apparently so." He moves his face closer and blows lightly on mine "Which means we have to start using protection."

I groan playfully. The doctor mentioned something about how for the pregnancy to work, it had to be in my 'prime day of ovulation'. To be honest I didn't even know what that meant until i asked the nurse. "Only when i'm ovulating though."

Dimitri cocks his head to the side "Do you know when that is?"

"No." I laugh "But i'll figure it out."

He smiles and stares into my eyes silently. For a long time we just stare until Dimitri says softly "I hate to say it but I'm glad we never had that baby."

I sigh. "Yeah me too. I am not ready for something like that." I knew that It was being selfish when so many people in the world cant have kids but I couldn't help it. I'm definatly not the maternal type.

"You're not even ready to move in with me and get married, let alone have a baby" Dimitri agrees "But when you're ready we can try, right?"

I don't know. A little part of my mind was always grateful for the apparent infertility between us, so I would never have to deal with giving up my career for a baby. "I don't think i'll ever be ready." I admit quietly.

Dimitri looks down at my lap and blinks. I frown and despite the small pain I get from it, I use my hand to lift up his chin "But..." But I knew he always wanted children, thats why all these years ago I gave him my blessing to go with Tasha. I mean who knows, if he had gone then I might not have been shot by her. "When I'm much, much older and we are married, we can try."

He looks genuinely surprised "Really? Why?"

I push him back so he is lying on the bed and I follow so I lean over him, careful not to rest my middle on him. "Yes really." I kiss his cheek. "Because you want them and I want to give you want you want."

"Wow." He leans up and brushes his lips against mine.

I grin and shrug "Only if we get a boy though. I do not want a girl."

Dimitri smirks and brushes hair from my face. "Why not. I like the idea of a baby girl. It would be like a little Rose running around."

I raise my eyebrow at him. "God could you imagine that, it would be traumatising."

"Yeah maybe it would." He laughs and shakes his head "I love you Rose."

"I love you Dimitri."