The Overthinking Addict

I Tried.

I try so hard to open your eyes but my love, but you are blind. With eyes wide open or shut, you still can't see. What will it take for you to see what you mean to me? I spill words from these tired lips each day and bleed my heart out on a piece of paper. But you always leave me hanging with these toxic thoughts, leaving it for later. But how about now? While we have each other? Why not now, while we still appreciate one another? l wish you can see how much this kills me inside. I no longer wish to run from it, I no longer wish to hide. My nights are filled with contemplating and over frustrating thoughts that haunt me. The confrontation is like condemnation to hell and you can't see. I'm always "overreacting" and too much to handle, only to you. | get tired of pouring out my soul and hurting, yet you don't see the truth. My constant need for validation and conversation makes you think. But when l punish myself for your pain, slits on my wrist and you don't fucking blink. You hold me, you mold me into something you called "yours". You make, you break me, am | no longer yours? You say you fell into a trap called love and couldn't get back up. You saw what you were getting into, walked into the bottomless pit and said you got stuck. Don't ever blame me for fucking you up. Even if I leave right now, the self hatred won't stop. You're suffocating and overdosing on the memories, leaving me hanging and I'm bleeding, yeah you love me. You had a hard life so you made my life hard too, always punishing the ones who get close to you. But baby, it gets better, even if you don't see it. Tomorrow will come, and you will smile. Sweetheart, I promise, you will see it