A L O N E || K.TH

四

he continued walking, memories flooding his mind. making him more emotional.

he remembered her funeral, everyone glared at him when he arrived. he wasn't even invited, he was kicked out not long after. he begged for them to let him see her one more time.

they refused, threatening to call the police, he had no other choice but to leave. the guilt just kept building up.

one excuse they used so that he wouldn't see her was that they knew she wouldn't have wanted him to come to her funeral. since it was his fault he didn't deserve to see her.

him crying his eyes out in front of them did nothing, they didn't even feel the littlest bit of pity or sadness for him.

to them it didn't matter how he felt, as long as they knew that he'd hurt her. they don't care for what he has to say.

his friends being the only people who talked to him, even strangers knew about the news.

rumours spread really fast, people changing up the story making Taehyung look even more bad. he used to volunteer at a child care.

but soon got told that parents don't feel comfortable with him around there kids. they think he will leave a bad influence on them.

"they don't want there kids to become the reason for someone's death in the future" he remembered his manager telling him.

he didn't understand, did they think he would really want to bring up what happened with a bunch of little kids?!

he was still hurt, not fully recovered. that hurt him even more. he felt useless.

he got sent to court, the girls family pleaded the judge to send him to jail. but he was not guilty, he wished the judge was right, but the guilt never stopped following him around.

the judge had said she did it to herself, that Taehyung didn't force her to kill herself nor was he a part of it. he didn't even know it happened. so therefore he is not guilty.

that didn't stop anyone from hating him, although he hoped it did. you can't always get what you want he would always tell himself.

he would apply for jobs, but gets rejected soon after, not because he is not capable but because of his reputation.

he hated that, he hated how he could not live a normal life, he wished he hadn't gotten in a relationship. he knew it was a bad idea.

it doesn't help that the town is small, meaning everyone hated him. they didn't have anything thing else to believe, since they haven't let him explain his side of this story.

—

even now, some people despise him. it's been a while since the incident. he hasn't gained anyone's trust yet.

but some people have let it slide, they let it stay as the past. he thanked those people. there was a time in his life where he questioned his life.

not wanting to live anymore, not acing anything to live for anymore.

his friends were distant, they wouldn't hang out with him as much. he couldn't get a job, and can't do anything he liked, for example look after and play with kids.

he wanted to end everything, but slowly things got better, he got a job. it wasn't the best but he was happy someone finally forgave him for his actions.

he then realised that his manager was new to the town, not knowing about what had happened.

that made him nervous, he was scared he would fire him, not wanting someone like him working for the company.

but after he found out, he wasn't effected he shrugged it off. surprising Taehyung.

he was so happy he felt like crying. his manager being his only friend. he didn't mind that, all he wanted was one person who cared for him.

and that's exactly what he got, and he's happy. he's not the same guy he used to be though, he's much mature now.

trying to not look happy in public, he knows people will think he got over the incident and doesn't care anymore.

how does he know? it's happened to him several times. so he decided to change the way he acted.

no more joking around, everything is serious, sometimes him and his manager would goof around. but it was nothing like the old days.

he wouldn't sleep sometimes, just thinking of the old times with his friends, before everything happened.

he would cry that night, wanting everything to back to normal. his friend stuck by him at the beginning.

but he was ruining there image and reputation, they decided to leave. not forgetting to apologise, as if that made him feel any better.

there hasn't been a day where he felt genuinely happy, after they left everything was dull and boring.

he misses them to the point he would do anything to find them, but he knows they don't want that. his friend Jimin sometimes contacted him.

saying he was worried for him and that he is going to come back. but Taehyung refused, telling him to not worry for him.

after that Jimin hasn't contacted, he used to contact him at least once in 3 months, but it soon stopped.

he sometimes regrets telling Jimin to not come back, but he knows it was for the best.

he was once caught hanging out with a girl in public, people accused him of being heartless, not listening to his explanation.

he had a tutor, since he dropped out of school, people bullied him. he couldn't  do it anymore so he left.

he hired a tutor making sure she didn't know what happened, he was surprised he found someone who didn't know anything about it.

she insisted they studied at the park, he knew it wasn't a good idea since there are a lot of people there.

but he couldn't say no.

—•_•—

he continued to walk finally stopping he realised he arrived at her grave.

his eyes widened in shock, he didn't even plan on coming here ever, he was too scared the guilt would take over.

his feet took him here, he wasn't paying attention too busy in thought.

he chocked on air,tears making there way out of his eyes as he ran his fingers across the stone, tracing her name.

sitting down he started crying.

"i-i'm s-so s-orry, ple- please forgive me" he cried out.

"I forgive you"