Nightingale (Sequel to Solider Boy)

Twenty-Five

Sometimes time moved slowly, like a glacier, so slow in it's path that the movement wasn't even noticeable. Other times, it moved impossibly fast, like the blink of an eye. Melody's last  three days in Wakanda were both. How, she wasn't sure but it was the truth.

The three days themselves, as she looked back had gone by faster than she could say "code blue" but the hours and minutes that made them up had moved slowly. Each moment had dragged out, each touch that passed between her and James, each word they'd said-those had all happened slowly. And now they were soon to be over for good. 

Melody packed her suitcase in silence, her heart broken and beating slowly in her chest. That heavy, crushing weight was already settling back over her chest. She folded a last blouse and placed it in the suitcase. Everything she'd brought with her was now packed away and ready for the trip back to New York. 

She stepped back from her neatly made bed. She hadn't slept in it recently. Every moment spare moment she hadn't between working with Shuri and chatting with Sharon Melody had been with James. Last night had been no exception and when she'd looked in the mirror this morning, there had been a small blossoming of bruises along her neck and shoulders.

Melody ran her fingers absentmindedly over one, sighing as she looked at the still-open suitcase. She just had to close it now, reach for the zipper and yank it shut-and yet she couldn't move. 

James' s hand shot out into her line of vision and zipped the suitcase shut. The noise was ten times louder in the silence. "You ready?" he asked softly. James's expression was one Melody had seen before, two years ago when they'd last said goodbye. His mouth wasn't quivering and his spine was straight, but there was a shining, sorrowful look in his eyes and the colorless tone of his voice told the story well enough.

"As I'll ever be," she said finally. It was the truth. She hadn't been ready for it two years ago, even with that nagging feeling in her gut telling her it was coming. She wasn't ready now either. 

James took a step towards her and wrapped his arm around her waist. "Melody," he said, his voice soft and his eyes still holding that sad gleam. "Please don't do this."

Melody's heart twisted in her chest. Since their conversation three days prior, neither she or James had brought up the matter again. She had thought it had been laid to rest, she knew James's didn't like it, but she had thought he'd at least understood why she couldn't return. 

"James," she whispered, holding his face in her hands. His cheeks were rough with stubble. "We can't do this." We can't keep trying to be together when we exist in two different worlds, she thought hating the truth of the words.

"We haven't even tried," he countered, voice still soft, but that didn't disguise the emotions burning in each word. "I know it wouldn't be easy," he smiled softly at her, the gesture was more sadness than joy. "I know that, but difficult doesn't mean impossible."

Melody swallowed hard, a lump in her throat, and she was sure, whatever the mass was made of, it was crushing her vocal chords. She couldn't speak as she looked at James. His sad eyes, his pained but hopeful smile drove a knife into her heart. The overwhelming urge, the same one that she'd felt when she'd crossed that line two years ago and kissed him moved through her body like a ripple. She wanted to hold him, kiss him and remove that pained smile from his face. She wanted to say yes, tell him they'd find a way to work and she'd be back to him soon as she could but she couldn't. She wouldn't give him empty promises. 

"I love you James," Melody whispered, choking on the words she as tried to speak past the sobs building up in her throat. "And I will always love you." As the words left her mouth, she realized why they were familiar, they were a variation of what James had told her the day they'd parted two years ago. Only now, it was her turn to say them. It was her turn to leave. 

James blinked and Melody saw a gleam of tears in his eyes now. The sight was worse than getting stitches without pain killers. 

"Nightingale."

The sound of her pet name broke her and Melody looked away from James, knees going weak as pain shot through her chest, right where her heart used to be.  Melody was no stranger to pain it had been her most constant companion as a girl but nothing, not cuts, stitches, blows or burns held a candle to this.  There was nothing in the world worse than loving someone and knowing you couldn't be together. Nothing at all.

"Hey," James's hand slid off her back and his cold fingers touched her face. "Don't worry, I'll be alright."

Melody tried to find her voice, tell him she would be too, but her voice was gone. The words wouldn't come. Maybe it was because she wasn't sure if that was true. So she said something that was. "I love you." 

 "I love you." He didn't say them as goodbye, they were another plea to stay. She shut her eyes, her body shaking with unreleased sobs. "Melody," the soft call of her name forced her to open her eyes, to breathe even though each one came with a sharp rush of pain. "Kiss me. Please."

Melody didn't even stop to think about saying no. She rose up on her toes, giving herself just enough extra height to do as he'd asked. Her hands slid over his face, back into his soft hair and she held him closer. The ragged thing that was her heart beating faster and more painfully than ever in her chest as she felt her kiss returned.  

I love you, she thought, tasting salt as they kissed. Whether it was from her tears or his Melody had no idea. She didn't care. This kiss, their last kiss was something that mattered. It hurt, but this pain was one she could live with. It wasn't because of cruelty, it was all due to love.

They broke apart, Melody's breath came in sharp, uneven bursts. "James," she whispered his name, unable to speak any louder. The weight was creeping up on her again and she knew it would crash fully onto her the moment she left the apartment. "Please, don't give up, with the lab-no matter what happens."  

"I won't, I promise." She felt James's lean into her again, a kiss against her forehead this time. "I love you." His last plea and this was one Melody couldn't answer, no matter how much she yearned to do just that.

"I love you too." Goodbye. And with that, Melody knew she couldn't stay like this any longer. She stepped out of James's embrace and grabbed her suitcase, resolutely keeping her gaze away from him as she walked out of the apartment. 

The door clicked shut behind her and as she turned, ready to walk down the hallway she spotted Sharon coming down the hallway, the agent was beaming at her.

"All packed and ready?" her friend asked cheerfully and Melody nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

Sharon frowned at her. "Mel, you okay? You look pale."

"I didn't sleep much last night," Melody replied which was true enough. She hadn't slept much at all, though it wasn't for the reasons Sharon was probably attributing to it and that was fine by her. 

"Well," Sharon shrugged. "At least you can sleep on the plane right?"

Melody adjusted her hand on the suitcase, glad of something, anything to do to distract herself. "Maybe, depends on where I'm seated and how the flight goes. We should go."

"Yeah," Sharon agreed. "Don't want to miss your flight. I bet you've really missed West Memorial huh?"

Melody nodded again.  I'll miss this place even more.

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Thanks for reading! :)