Fall

Samantha

"Ouch," Greyson says as I gently pat his scarred lips with the icebag. "Sorry," I tell. He replies off with another smile. Stop doing that. I'm in love.

"I'll just fix the sleeping mat for a while," he says after the icebag runs out of ice. He stood up, then settles the little bed he'll be sleeping in tonight. As he does, I looked around the room. "So I finally saw how it looked like," I said. It's the first time I've been up here. "Yes, feel at home," he responds.

I remembered what I should do, at least before the night ends. Confess everything.

"Greyson?" I try.

"What is it?"

"There's.. there's something I'd like to tell you," I said as I walked around the room and leaned on the edge of the study table.

"Tell me."

"Greyson it's about--"

I was about to speak up but then something from his study table fell. He went closer to pick it up, and puts it back. My eyes were in sudden tears.

"Why... why do you have that?"

He sighs, and sits on the bed. "It's... It's an old photograph. Of me.. And my childhood best friend. We.. we used to be so close."

"Then? What... happened?"

He laughed, but I knew he was faking. "She.. she left me." He said, as I watch a tear fall down from his face. "She's the first girl I've ever loved."

I tried my best not to show but it did hit me. He was hurt.

"You still love her?"

"I don't know.." He says. "You know, I'd say I still do, but everytime I remember how she left me, left me like that.. I.. I don't know. I feel angry. Betrayed."

"Greyson, if... If you ever see her again, what would you do?"

"I honestly don't care about her anymore.. Why should she even return? She left. I've erased her permanently from my heart and my life."

My heart crushes.

"How if you found out that she loves you, too?"

"Stupid," he says. "If she really did love me she wouldn't have broke my heart. Would you ever imagine.. After five years she just suddenly shows up and acts like nothing ever happened. That's just ridiculous." He says. "I don't.. want to talk about her anymore." He goes back to setting up the sleeping mat. "So.. what was that you were saying?"

"Oh I... Nothing.. I just wanted to say thank you for.. fighting for me," I fake a smile in the realest way I can. He can't know it Sam. Not now.

"You're welcome, Sam." He smiles. "You're just that important."

"Thank you."

Never have I ever imagined that he felt that way all along. That he loved me like how I loved him. Love him, because up until now I still do. It's wrong, so wrong, but I can't unlove him. It hurts to see how he dismays the Samantha that used to be, and it kills to know that all he ever feels is anger and betrayal upon me, who has not felt anything but love. I know he'll get mad for me not saying this, but I don't think I can ever get another chance to say it. I don't have the right words.

He's hurt, as hell, and it's all because of me.