disappointment town / jjk

six

"i'm— i'm sorry— god, i thought— i thought i had it all in control," he gasps as they finally stop in one of the alleyways to hide from the streets of the dead night.

jungkook lets go of jiseo's hand, raising his other hand to place it against the wall to support his body that's sore from all the running a few moments ago. jiseo puts her both of her hands on knees and pants heavily, sweat rolling down the side of the female's and male's faces in thick beads.

"shit," he curses, "i'm sorry you got into this mess. maybe— maybe we should've never talked, then this wouldn't have happened."

"i'm sorry," he apologizes again as he inhales the air, trying to calm down the adrenaline rushing through his veins. "this is all my fault, i'm so sorry."

jiseo takes a minute to compose herself, "look— it's— it's okay," she says.

"no, it's not okay and you know that."

"we'll make it work," she says. "it's fine, the only thing that matters now is the fact that we're both not dead."

the boy turns to face her and she realizes that he's hurt. she stares at some of the purple-ish bruises on his face, specifically on his cheek. it's new, she knows it, she knows he just fought two of the guys that were bothering her earlier to get her out of there.

she frowns and jungkook probably noticed the distraught expression, so he speaks up. "it's okay, they'll heal," he reassures calmly.

"gosh, i feel so bad," jiseo's frown grows deeper and jungkook tilts his head questioningly.

"it was honestly my fault."

the atmosphere is filled with only their ragged breaths and the rustling sound of car tires on the streets once they both stop speaking. jiseo takes the time to observe the young male, his attire is all black, like every other time jiseo has seen him. she wonders if he wears different colours and whether or not she'll have the chance to see it.

"you're okay, right?" the boy looks at her direction and holds the stare, "not hurt anywhere?"

jiseo shakes her head as a gesture to signify no, she's not hurt. jungkook then gives her a small smile, a smile where it doesn't reach his eyes, but it's comforting.

—

"no, back off, i can do it myself," jungkook huffs as he pushes jiseo's hand away. they're sitting at the table outside the convenience store, where they bought a few bandages for the male's bruises and cuts.

"i'm just trying to help," she argues but jungkook ignores her statement, avoiding her her hand that tries to help him apply the oilment on his face by using the shitty grainy quality of the camera of his phone as a mirror.

"so, what's your name?"

"now you want my name to get some background research on me?"

"i think it's fair if i know yours, since you know mine."

jiseo places her chin on the palm of her hand with her arm resting on the table, "you know what's fair jeonghan? you letting me help you with those bandages and not killing me after this," jiseo rambles.

"it's jungkook."

"yeah, i meant jungkook or whatever your name is."

he laughs with fondness, "i already said you're on my good list."

"so you're not accepting my help?"

"nope."

the corner of jiseo's lips curve downwards into a frown. "then at least let me pay for that stuff, you got hurt because of me," she gestures at the box of bandages and bottle on ointment sitting on the table.

"sure, whatever," he lets out a giggle. a fucking giggle, and jiseo somehow wants to hit him square in the face.

"why are you so giggly?" jiseo raises one of her eyebrows. "i've never seen a person smiling after getting hurt but okay, you do you i guess."

"maybe i'm enjoying this moment while it lasts," he replies and she feels her heart skip a beat.

"you know," jiseo starts, making the youthful boy in front of her turn his attention from the reflection of his own face to her. "you're reckless."

"reckless?"

"you act like you're not afraid to die," jiseo says.

it takes him a few seconds to answer her statement. "what makes you say that?"

"back when.. you said you messed with those thugs," she continues. "and earlier, it was two against one, were you really sure you were able to succeed? what if you, i don't know, die while trying to help me just now?"

"but i didn't."

"—what if you did?" jiseo declares. "it's like you don't care whether or not whatever you're doing is going to go well."

"i.. don't," he presses his lips into a thin line. "you only live once, right?"

"but you could do so much more," jiseo says and jungkook places his hand on the table.

"sometimes, life doesn't go the way you plan it to," he elaborates. "it's... always the bad things that follow you. i mean, good things don't last forever ya know, but most bad things do."

but he's not right, jiseo thinks, he's wrong. "not everyone gets happy endings," he carries on. "bad endings exist too."

"but you can enjoy the little things that happen in life," he shrugs, and jiseo hates how careless he is.

"but— it can be so much more, those little things you said, they could be big things," she disagrees.

"well, like i say, some people don't get happy endings," it's his turn to frown now.

"why are you sticking your oar in my life anyway?" he huffs, "i thought we were getting along, are you like those policemen? a person that doesn't like having fun either?"

"i'm giving you advice."

"you have your whole life ahead of you, but i don't, you gotta think about the bad things i've done," he stops to let out a sigh. "bad things that you would never understand."

"maybe i want to understand."

"do you really?" he shoots back. "it's scary once you know what i've done."