[Be More Chill] Boyf Riends One-Shots

13. Control [Part 3/3]

17 years later

Jeremy walked past the black gates, the cold breeze biting at his nose. He pulled his scarf up over his face, pausing for a moment to adjust it comfortably. In his other hand, he held a boquet of flowers. Sighing, he continued to walk down the gravel path.

After a few minutes of walking, he stopped near a tall, near-leafless maple tree.

"Hey, Michael," he said softly, pulling his scarf down below his chin. His breath turned to fog in the late-autumn air. "Long time no see, huh..?"

The breeze blew, ruffling Jeremy's hair softly, almost as if it was a reply from his best friend. Jer' closed his eyes for a moment, hesitating before speaking again.

"I, uh... I know you never really liked flowers all that much," Jeremy chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "I know the pollen usually gave you allergies. But, you'll have to forgive me, just this once."

Tears began to prick Jeremy's eyes as he placed the flowers upon grass, right in front of Michael's gravestone. He smiled before wiping them away, sitting beside the grave.

"How've you been, buddy? Do you, uh... Like your new home?" He asked. "You have a nice view from here. And it's close to your childhood home..!"

He trailed off, at a loss for words to say. What could he say? He killed his best friend, dang it. He hadn't seen... No, visited him in 17 years. The ache in his heart only grew stronger when he realized he'd never see Michael again.

"Things aren't th-the same without you around," Jeremy said quietly, at last. "It's hard knowing that I'll never be able to... To see you again."

He leaned back onto his hands, staring into the gray-blue sky. "I... I miss you. I miss us," he sighed. "I miss our gaming-all nighters, the midnight trips to 7/11. All your dumb jokes and puns about my name, the... The way you could always cheer me up..."

Jeremy sat back up again, tears beginning to fall down his cheeks. "Bu-but now you're not even here! Yo-You can't cheer me up now, you... You're not here to tell me that it'll all be okay." He tried to wipe away his tears again. "But it isn't okay Michael. You're not here. I mi-miss you so, so much..."

"I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry..." He sobbed, his shoulders trembling with each shaky breath. "I should've, I-I should've never taken that thing! Then maybe... Maybe you'd still be here..."

Jeremy sniffled, wrapping his jacket tighter around him. He stayed silent, only letting out small sobs here and there. Warm tears fell down his cheeks, dripping into the grass without a noise.

"Do you remember," he hiccuped, "what you said to me after the divorce..? You told me you'd 'always be Heere' for me..." He smiled gently. "And whenever we got into a f-fight, do you temember what you'd say to me? Y-You'd tell me that n-nothing would ever break us apart..."

"I'm so sorry..." He whimpered. "I'm so sorry I was the reason you're n-not here... If I could have one re-do at life, I-I would have never taken that thing..."

"It still comes back, you know... I-I tried to get rid of it, but I-I still have scars, and I can still he-here it's voice... I wished that you'd live a-and that once I-I was freed from jail, y-your words would overcome th-the SQUIP's..."

"And it's all my fault th-that... That my wish didn't come true..." He whispered.

Jeremy sat there in silence for awhile, silently crying as memories of his best friend danced in his head. At some point, tiny snowflakes began to fall as the sun set below the distant horizon. Jeremy shivered, pulling his scarf over his nose once more.

After a long time of sitting, Jeremy checked his watch. "Sh-shoot... I sh-should get home..."

He stood up, smiling guiltily at Michael's gravestone. "I'm sorry, buddy. I-I'll visit you again sometime soon, okay?"

He began to walk away, stopping in his tracks only a few steps away. He turned around, gazing back at where he sat. "Oh, Michael..?"

"I... I love you too..."

The End