Deflowered

Chapter 5

"Sometimes you don't realize you're drowning when you're trying to be everyone else's anchor."

"Hey baby." The melodic echo of Adam's voice filled the darkness of the room and the shadowy alleys of my mind as I slowly roused from sleep. I let my phone rest on my ear as my arms laced around his pillow.

"Hi."

"I'm sorry for waking you. I just got out of the shower and wanted to call before I went to bed."

"It's fine. You know, I don't sleep well  when you're not here. I miss you."

"I miss you, too. How was dinner? Or better question, how did Mawmaw's apple pie do in the city?"

"Oh, you know her." I smiled. "She's still caring for people's stomachs even from the grave."

"Sounds like her."

"Dinner went well though. He wants to attend church with me on Sunday."

"Really?" Adam's shock made me laugh.

"Yeah, I was a little surprised as well."

"I had no idea he was Christian."

"You know I don't think he is, but I think he's curious."

"Well, either way it can't hurt. He might hate it or he might like it and want to attend again."

"I think so too. How is your trip?"

"It's been a little overwhelming, but I am doing pretty well. The situation isn't as serious as they made it sound ...I got hit on tonight." Adam added with slight hesitation.

I couldn't help but laugh. Not because the idea of my husband being hit on was outrageous, but I knew it was a spark outside of our marriage I'd never be able to give him. I also trusted him to not act on it.

"Doesn't surprise me. You're probably something different there with your blonde hair and blue eyes."

"She looked like you though which was weird. I mean definitely not as beautiful." I scoffed and gingerly smirked at his added attempt and his sudden struggle for words.

"I just found it crazy that there is someone that looked so much like you in Hong Kong, of all places."

"Yeah." I decided I should change the subject to give the poor man a lifeline. "I scheduled our consult with the fertility specialist next week for Thursday. I'll remind you again when you're home. "

"You're excited, huh?" I could tell he was in bed. His voice was enveloped in drowsy warmth.

"Yes!" I shot back as my heart started to race and flutters erupted in my belly in anticipation. I felt these same butterflies when I had scheduled the appointment. Once again, it was all becoming a real possibility; one that we had doubted years ago would ever come to fruition. I dreamt of our baby several times the past six years. I'd imagine a little girl with her tiny hands exploring Adam's face, her blue eyes so inquisitive, and her blonde curls bouncing as Adam rocked her.

"Me too. You'll have everything."

"Well, I wanted to tell you that I am thinking about going back to school. I visted a photographer's gallery the other day and it was amazing. There's so much more to learn for me with photography especially here. I've missed enrollment this fall so we have almost a year before I would go, but I have been looking at Colombia College. They have an amazing photography program." I started to ramble, my excitement on the outskirts of bursting.

"Amelia..." I recognized his tone, and I knew instantly he hated the idea. "Why do you want your bachelors? Your associate's degree is just fine. And if all goes well, we'll have a baby by then. You remember what Dr. Peters told us, that with your age and because you are so healthy, our chances of success are really good.