All in my Head

Chapter 16

 Jonah's POV

"Do you guys smell something funny?" Evan asks, scratching his head.

"YES," Jul shoots up and practically yells her response. "Sorry, but yes, I 100% smell something absolutely foul. I have a really good sense of smell usually but for a second there I was afraid I was having a stroke."

"Yeah, I definitely smell it too, like maybe eggs or something?" I reply, sniffing the air around me trying to detect the origin of the foul scent in the air.

We're all sitting here sniffing, probably looking insane to anyone watching. I'm laughing as I watch Jul make her way over to Evan's desk, following the scent trail like a bloodhound following a hunch. She sniffs her way right up to Evan, before exclaiming, eyes wide, "Evan! Oh my God, it's you!" She wrinkles her nose and steps away.

I wheel my chair a foot forward to get a better whiff of Evan and, sure enough, the foul scent is definitely coming from him. "Dude, I mean this with as little offense as possible, but you are emitting an utterly foul scent right now. It's like you bathed in salt and vinegar chips or something," I say, following Jul's lead and getting some distance.

"What?! Are you guys serious! I literally just showered this morning, how could I possibly smell bad!" Evan insists, freaking out now as he smells every single body part he can. Armpits, nope. Feet, nope. Fingers (ew), nope. He scratches his head then, raking his fingers through his hair.

"Wait! Evan, run your hand through your hair again!" Jul proclaims, bravely venturing closer to Salt&Vin, my new nickname for Evan. He does as Jul asks, repeating the same action that sweeps his hair back temporarily. Jul steps forward. "Ok, don't get weirded out by this," she says as she dives straight in and smells his hair. What in the world is happening.

"Ough!!" Jul utters, making a face of utter repulsion as she points hurriedly towards Evan's hair. "It's your hair, it's definitely your hair."

Evan then grabs a lock of his hair and, as gross as it sounds, smells his fingers. "Oh my God," he says, eyes closed and mouth pulled in a tight unpleasant frown. "You're so right, Jul."

"Salt&Vin, what did I tell you about showering every day?" I ask teasingly.

"First of all, please don't let that be my new nickname. Secondly, I did shower! Like literally an hour ago! Oh. my. God." He says suddenly, slapping his hand on his forehead. "It was those goddamn teeny bopper lax bros!! I noticed the shampoo was a little runnier today than usual but didn't think anything of it but I bet you those little bastards put vinegar in my shampoo bottle!" He says, clenching a fist in frustration.

Jul and I bust out laughing now. "Yeah, there's no way we're calling you by anything other than Salt&Vin now. Maybe S&V? Or just Vin for short?" Jul says between laughs.

Just then, Ava walks up. "Hey, can you guys keep it down? This is a place of business and I'm trying to get some work done over there," she says with mock authority before laughing. "Clearly kidding, I was just doodling WWF over and over again over there but you guys looked like you were having way more fun over here. What in the heck is happening?"

Still laughing, Jul explains, "Those little lacrosse boys Evan lives with pranked him again and put vinegar in his shampoo this morning."

"Oh my God, you can totally smell it over here. I wasn't going to say anything but, wow," Ava responds, laughing and waving her hand back and forth in front of her face to diffuse the scent. "The real question is, how in the world did you not notice immediately, Evan?"

"Yeah, seriously, Vin, how did that go unnoticed?" I ask, finally joining in the conversation instead of smirking at Ava like an idiot.

"Did you just call him Vin?" Ava asks me. Her eyes are gorgeous. "As in Vin... Diesel?" she asks, brows furrowed in confusion.

"No," I answer laughing, "as in vinegar, Evan's new signature scent."

"Oh, wow I love that," she responds with genuine enthusiasm.

"ANYWAYS," Evan says, "I noticed a general funk this morning, but I'm living with four 17 year olds who are sweating all day and sometimes bathe in Axe instead of taking real showers so I just thought it was one of them okay!!!" He insists. We're all cracking up now.

Just then, Nick, who I genuinely forgot was here, as I usually do, pops up from behind his desk. He's sitting on his own desk, arm leaning against the divider in what I guess he thinks is a casual pose. He has his obnoxious headphones still half on his head, only pumping his one ear full of trash EDM music. He looks like a washed up wannabe DJ who uses his gigs as an excuse to hit on women. Ick.

"So," Nick says loudly, clearly trying to get the rest of us to stop talking. "...Ava, I saw you got my gift this morning." He gives a slight chuckle as he glances down at his desk only so he can look back up "seductively"* (*read "horrifyingly").

Ava's eyes widen as she glances at Jul. "Um, yeah I did," she says uneasily. "It was, uh, kind of different?"

"I thought you would like it," he responds with a slimy smirk. I'm staring at Nick in disbelief, likely with a horrified look on my face, but see Ava look towards me out of the corner of my eye. I look back at her, making eye contact for just a moment before she looks away again. Slight improvement from the first time she made eye contact, right? I try to convince myself.

"Um, yeah, sure..." Ava says. "I should probably be getting back to my desk," she says to all of us. I'm pissed that Nick ruined what otherwise would've been a good conversation, suddenly worried that Nick's presence will deter Ava from coming over to Cluster 2.

"But hey," she says, turning around again, "We've definitely got to think of a way for you to get them back, Vin." She smirks at Evan, then decidedly at me, and walks away.