All in my Head

Chapter 17

Ava's POV

I try to pay attention to the graphic I'm supposed to be tinkering with, but I'm distracted as I think about my impeccably horrible fortune of being secretly admired by Nick. I find myself gazing back over at Cluster 2, although this time it's because they are actually being pretty rowdy and not just because I'm bored and need something aesthetically pleasing (Jonah) to look at.

I look around my cluster quickly, Kacie occupied by snapchat, Kelly and Lewis busily working away at some debt profile they were assigned together. No one will notice if I leave for a few minutes, I think to myself as I get up quickly and head over to Cluster 2.

"Hey, can you guys keep it down? This is a place of business and I'm trying to get some work done over there," I say, pretending to be angry when in reality I'm so happy they gave me an excuse to come over here. "Clearly kidding, I was just doodling WWF over and over again over there but you guys looked like you were having way more fun over here. What in the heck is happening?"

Jul is laughing but still scrambles to fill in me quickly. "Those little lacrosse boys Evan lives with pranked him again and put vinegar in his shampoo this morning."

"Oh my God, you can totally smell it over here. I wasn't going to say anything but, wow," I say. And it's true. I noticed a rotten smell as soon as I walked within ten feet of their cluster but honestly just assumed it was somehow related to Nick. Like his stinky personality was now physically oozing out of his body. I turn my attention to Evan and his lovely caramel eyes, asking, "The real question is, how in the world did you not notice immediately, Evan?"

Jonah pipes up for the first time then. My eyes flit over to him as he speaks where I linger for a moment before looking back to Evan. "Yeah, seriously, Vin, how did that go unnoticed?" he asks.

"Did you just call him Vin?" I ask him with a suspicious raise of the eyebrow. "As in Vin... Diesel?" I'm making direct eye contact with him without even flinching, too distracted by the unexpected appearance of comically thumb-y and improbably limber action movie actor, Vin Diesel.

"No," he answers chuckling a little. "As in vinegar, Evan's new signature scent," he responds.

I laugh in response, saying earnestly "Oh, wow I love that."

"ANYWAYS," Evan interrupts our aside, getting back to where the conversation previously left off, explaining how he made it a full hour into his day with hair positively reeking of vinegar.

"So," Nick suddenly says. He's just gone right ahead and propped himself up against the desk divider in what has got to be the least appealing pose I've ever laid eyes on. His headphones, the big kind that only literal DJs and posers wear I think, are still half on his head, giving him what I'm sure he thinks is a casual vibe, but what is giving me the most grotesque feelings inside right now.

Apparently, and I guess thankfully, not seeing the ugly thoughts running through my mind, Nick continues. "Ava, I saw you got my gift this morning," he says with a forced side smirk on his face.

I can't help it this time - I glance at Jul, letting all of my discomfort and horror show on my face for a brief moment. I don't even care if he sees me at this point.

Jul's face only reads "girl, I have no fucking clue," so I'm forced to handle this one on my own. "Um, yeah I did. It was, uh, kind of different?" I manage to choke out.

"I thought you would like it," he responds. When the fuck did I ever say I liked it? How did I even imply that in any way? Read the room, Nick!!! I steal a quick look at Jonah just to see how he's taking this conversation. He looks back at me for just a moment, and I try to read what he's feeling for a moment before looking back towards Nick. I need to finish this God awful conversation.

"Um, yeah, sure... I should probably be getting back to my desk now actually," I say, not even caring at this point if Nick can see through my thinly veiled lie. Maybe I should stop coming over here all together, I think as I turn around on my heels. It's not like there's even anything real here with Jonah. Just all things I've made up in my head.

"But hey, we've definitely got to think of a way for you to get them back, Vin," I say to Evan before looking to my right and making eye contact with Jonah again. I swear I feel something in that moment of eye contact, but then again I'm me and I have a tendency to "create things in my head that have absolutely no basis in reality, Ava."

By Wednesday at lunch, Evan, Jul, Kelly, Jonah and I are all discussing possible pranks Evan could pull on his twerpy roommates. Despite being beyond happy that Jonah could actually join us for lunch today, I can still feel myself struggling to make direct conversation with him. As if my body revolts against my mind and I have no choice but to act awkwardly around Jonah. I'm still acting like my normal self when talking directly to everybody else, I just know I'm shutting down a little when it comes to him. This has been a consistent pattern in my life; I like a boy and want so badly for him to like me too, yet I still have trouble overcoming the old awkward Ava I used to be in my middle school years who can't form a single god damn sentence around any boy she finds even remotely attractive.

"Ok, what about this classic:" Evan begins to propose, taking a needed breather from the gyro he's been attacking for the last five minutes straight. "We absolutely slather two pigs in butter or grease or something and then I release them into the house, BUT the real catch is we mark them 1 and 3 beforehand! That way those little idiots are not only chasing those slippery pigs around, but then once they catch them they'll think there's still one loose. It's genius!!"

We're all silent for a moment before absolutely cracking up.

"Evan!" Jul's the first one to break through, hitting goofy Caramel Eyes like she just can't get enough of his endearingly silly ways. She opens her mouth to speak but can't manage to get a word out before cracking up again.

Jonah cuts in then, criticizing his office bff "Evan, that would never work!" I nod my head in agreement, still giggling at the absurdity of his suggestion. "Like, where would you even get two pigs?"

Jul and I crack up again. How could Jonah possibly think that that is the biggest issue with this "prank."

"Jonah, you're kidding me!" I say, feeling emboldened after our extensive laughing fit. Almost like a runner's high, but with laughter. A laughter's high, if you will. "That is not the biggest flaw in Evan's plan here."

"Yeah," Jul says, "Seriously, Ev, I think you might be combining two quote unquote classic pranks here bud."

"And, Evan, think about it," I say, looking directly into Evan's eyes (still as hazel as ever, closer to the color of the actual metal than any Crayola crayon has ever managed to get). I put my hand over his hand in an attempt to get him to really focus in and hear me. "If you release two crazy greased up pigs into your apartment, what's the issue there?" I stare him dead in the eyes, mentally urging him to get this crucial error in his prank.

"Ohhhhh you're so right, Aves," Evan says. I sigh in relief, thankful that he finally sees it too. "They would definitely retaliate with something way worse." Swing and a miss, folks. Swing and a miss. "And I can't even think of anything that would be worse than a couple of greasy ass pigs running around in your house, oiling up every surface, squealing all about - OH WAIT -"

"-that's what I'm saying!" I say just as the revelation is hitting home for Evan. He's a computer whiz but I swear sometimes this kid can be a little slow on the uptake.

"Okay okay, so then pigs are definitely out?" Evan questions, somewhat disappointedly.

"YES" we all shout in unison.

"What if..." Kelly pipes in from the end of the table, relatively quiet up until this point. "Okay, so I saw this one time on some prank video that came up on my Facebook feed and it was really cool, it's just really time consuming. Is there any time they're all not there during the day?"

"Yeah, they have evening practice from 5 - 9 every Thursday, but they usually stay out later and 'try to pick up girls'. Would that be enough time?" Evan responds.

"Oh yeah," she says deceptively as she dives into the details of a masterful plan.