What do we do in this situation?

-

This continues the part I announced that there are 2 kind of ends. This part starts when he said. "Meredith your tumor free" But in a different sentence.

"Meredith.."

"What what's wrong!?" She sits up and looks trough the window. "Derek why are you crying!?" I didn't notice the tears until she mentioned it.

"Meredith, it has grown a lot.. I'm sorry but you have max 3 days.." Bailey says and stands up and leaves.

"D-derek.." She burst out in tears. I walk over to her and lift her into my arms. We sit there for ages, crying in each other's arms. Reminiscing about the good and the bad times.

After ages I stand up and wipe my tears away. "Let's get you a room and rest there a bit." She nods and reaches out for me to lift her. I slowly lift her into bridal style. I walk to the nurses station and ask for a room before Arizona and April joined us.

"What's wrong you guys?" They look at us.

"Umm.. it grown.. max 3 days.." I say when I bring her to the room.

"No.." Arizona sighs and looks at Meredith who's now tucked into the bed. "God why..?"

"I'm supposed to say that.." April jokes lightly.

"Meredith.. want the kids to come for a while?" Arizona asks.

"Yes please.. But not to long. Please."

"Sure.." She smiles a bit and leaves the room with April.

"Derek.. can you please get alex.. I can't go without telling him." He nods and gives a quick kiss. "love you.."

"I love you too."

"until I die" I smile a bit. He smiles back and leaves the room. I grab a piece of paper and start writing a letter.

Once I'm done I wait a bit and feel a sharp pain in my heart. It keeps hurting until I can't see a thing. Everything goes black.

I hear Derek walking in and screaming things. I slowly open my eyes and look at him. "To.. love eac- love each other t..til dead.. sheds us..."

I close my eyes again. I tried to open them again. But I fade. I just fade. I hear screams and cries of Zola and Bailey.

I hear Derek crying. I hear Alex mumering. I can't do anything, them I hear nothing. I open my eyes, I see Lexie. I see Mark and George."I left my kids alone.. I left Derek alone what the hell am I?"

I start crying loudly. Dead shead us apart. Dead shead my kids apart. "I wanna go back! I want to hold Ellis.. I want to put Zola to sleep and read Bailey a story." I cry harder and harder.

Derek's POV
There lays her lifeless body. Zola crying, so does Bailey and I. Miranda walks in with shock. "No.." She looks at everyone and start tearing too. "I was going to tell I had a god damn solution. I.. I could've saved her.. Its my fault!" Her whole body trembles.

"Bailey it isn't.. she's just gone. Doesn't have to suffer anymore. It is your fault. It isnt.. don't blame yourself."

"Okay.. okay.." she sighs and looks at Meredith.

I look at her bed and see something on her table, a letter. I grab it and open it.

Dear who ever is reading this. I'm bad at writing letters.

So.. um yeah I'm going to say goodbye trough a letter..because there are so many people and I can't say it in person before getting really nervous.

Dear Derek,
I know and I'm sorry that I didn't say goodbye in person. It would be been too hard for you either for me. Thank you for being my knight and shiny what ever.

Thank you for being my best friend, the father of my children, my soulmate, my husband, my love of my life. Which just ended. Ha.. okay I won't laugh with it.

Thank you for taking care of me when I was sick, feeling down, mad, mad at you, jealous or nervous.

Thank you for loving me when you hated me and all the fight we had.

Thank you for giving me these amazing children.

Thank you, just thank you so much. I love you from the moon, go around it and back. And I know you're gonna say: 'i love you more'. And I know that because I've got to hear it everyday.

This is my end of my letter to you. I could've said a lot more but when it comes to it I only have this for you and that's just sad for such an amazing caring person.

Bye Derek x
Your Meredith x

PS. Thank you for the amazing house. And leaving your wife for me. And making me your wife. Or giving me kids. Or writing the post it. Any way..

Bye x

I end the letter with tears streaming down my face. I'm not the only one, everyone read there letter of Meredith. Zola's reading Bailey's, because he can't read that good. I'm gonna have a hard time. I will..

3 months later
The kids are with Arizona. I'm standing on a chair, a rope around my neck. Holding a razor blade. I cut my wrist up all the way and blood sprays out of my wrist.

I do the same with the other. Then I push the chair away. I hang there. I can't live without Meredith. My Meredith. She's my life. I can't live without her.

That was my end. I left my kids alone. I did. Sadly enough.
_____________________________________
I wake up and pull Meredith closer. "Good morning love.. I just had this weird dream about-"

Dreams can be realistic, but aren't always true.

This is the end of the story I hope you liked it. Thank you so much for the support.
~Lizzie ❤💕