Rain

June 6, 2009

I woke up the next morning feeling like I was the worst person in the world. I didn't know if I should keep reading the diary or let the words of the past stay in the past. I opted out of going to school, it is my senior year and I really wasn't going to be doing much. Skipping school would give me a longer read time, my mother would be gone most of the day running errands and I could lay in bed and dive back into the world of Elizabeth. My mother questioned me for what felt like an eternity on why I wasn't going to school and if she needed to stay home to take care of me, I eventually convinced her that I just wanted to go back to sleep and I would see her when she got back. Reluctantly she left, I hurried to Liz's room and made myself comfortable on the floor with some pillows to dive back in, I hope today's reading isn't as heart wrenching as yesterday.

June 6, 2007 – Today is the third day being home and second day being back in this house. I couldn't really sleep last night because I kept waiting to hear my grandfather yelling at the TV, fridge or any other household appliance for not being built like the old days. Today my brilliant sister was on a rampage, she was convinced that I had taken one of her Victoria Secret bags. As much as I would like to say that I am capable of being that girly, I'm not. She decided she was going to run around like a chicken with her head cut off screaming "I don't know why you took it." And my personal favorite "If you weren't so lame you wouldn't have to steal from your baby sister." She really is a joy to be around sometimes.

After about a half hour of accusing me of stealing it the little brat found it underneath her bed. Perhaps if she cleaned her room she wouldn't have to worry about not being able to find something. I made sure she knew that if her room was clean she would have found it, I was met with a dirty glare and the typical teenage response "Whatever." I wish I could say that I was surprised and or heart broken by the lack of respect that my sister seems to have for anyone older than her, but I'm not. My mother of course was silent through most of this and remained in the living room, it was almost like she had lost hope in us ever getting along. Before I left for college she would have been all over us "Girls, stop that fighting this instant. Love each other now because you never know what happens in the future." She would usually follow this remark up with some tears or the "mom" look.

Jade decided that now that she had found her bag, it was time that I too have one. She just kept saying "Since you're going to be here and mom is forcing me to hang out with you, we are getting you new clothes and a new bag. I refuse to be seen with a nerd." She uttered as she looked at my clothes and purse made from old shirts in disgust. I honestly thought it was cute, apparently I didn't know what cute was anymore. My only retort was to smile and hug her, I received a very annoyed groan and a "Get off me." But I could have sworn I saw a smile hidden behind that. Maybe Jade still had some purity left under all the plastic after all.

Getting ready was a mess, Jade decided that I needed to brush, wash, and cut my hair. She said she wasn't going to walk around with a raggedy Ann doll lookalike. Which made no sense, my hair is the same color as hers. After that fiasco was over she wanted to do my makeup, which was a joy. I don't even remember how many times she stabbed in the eye with that evil brush. After the makeup came the clothing. I, of course, had to wear something from her closet because all of my clothes were too baggy. "Why do you insist on wearing clothes that are baggy when you've become so slim? Really Elizabeth you are almost as attractive as I am under the baggy clothes and messy hair." Jade said searching through her closet, examining every outfit before looking at me and deciding it wasn't the right one. I blushed at her comment about me being as attractive as her, even if it wasn't true it's the sweetest thing she's said to me since I've been here. She may not have meant it to be sweet, but it was.

After an hour of going through mountains of clothes she finally decided on a pair of black hip hugging pants that said Pink on the bottom and a black spaghetti strap tank top. I must admit this here, because I will never tell her but I looked damn good. I don't think I have ever stared at myself in the mirror that long, I kind of felt like a Barbie but I liked it. "Enjoying my handiwork?" Jade asked sitting on the bed behind me. "No, I'm asking myself how Barbie's go all day with this much crap on their face." Jade made a disapproving grunt "You're have to stop calling us Barbie's if you're going to be around us." Jade mumbled as she came to stand next to me, admiring herself in the mirror. "My God we look hot." She said running her hands through her hair and making various poses. "This calls for a picture." I looked at her in shock, my sister never wanted to take pictures with me. "Don't make that face, now smile." She demanded as she snapped our first picture together willingly since we were kids. My heart warmed but I couldn't show her that, I played it off like it was nothing.

After a few more pictures we headed downstairs, my mother was nowhere in sight. Jade informed me that she usually went to go run errands or spend time with her girlfriends during the day and stayed home with her during the night. I didn't know my mom even had friends outside of her two sisters Jenny and Mary. I really had missed a lot since being gone, it almost didn't feel like home anymore. Jade insisted that we hurry to the mall to meet her friends Brittany, Nikki, and Paige. She also insisted that we take her Pink Mustang instead of my Kia Soul.

It only took us about a half hour of Jade screaming, honking and almost getting us killed before we arrived at the mall in the next town over. The Barbie brigade was waiting in front of the mall for us as we walked up. They all eyed me like I was their competition, it made me feel pretty for once. Jade introduced me as her formally lame sister who was transformed by her masterful work. They all look astonished that it was even me, I didn't think I looked that much different from high school. Brittany commented on how much weight I had lost which made me blush. Paige commented on how my hair was just as pretty as Jade's and Nikki gave me the fakest smile I've ever received and told me that I looked good. We stood outside the mall for twenty minutes while the three of them commented on how great their makeup, hair and outfits were.

When we finally did get to head into the mall, the most amazing thing happen to me that day. Something that Jade acted that she wasn't bothered by but I could tell she was clearly jealous. Chaz Forman was sitting in the food court with some guys I didn't recognize. The one guy I was hoping I didn't see turned out to be a blessing, or maybe a curse too early to tell. As soon as we sat down with our fruit smoothies he was staring at us, I assumed, as did the rest of the Barbie's that he was looking at Jade. It was no surprise when he came over to us and asked how we were doing. The surprise came after, he looked be in the eyes and said "Elizabeth, you look good. I want to apologize for how mean I was in high school. Give me a chance to make it up to you, how about dinner tomorrow at seven?" He asked with a smile. My cheeks felt like they were on fire, my heart was beating so fast and hard I was sure everyone in the food court could hear it, my hands were sweaty and all managed to get out was "Uh, yeah, sure." He smiled and told me he would see me at seven and returned to his friends. The Barbie's were all staring at me, mouths gaping open like a whale trying to catch plankton. I remember Jade telling us we were wasting time focusing on my date and needed to get clothes, especially if I was going on a date with Chaz. The rest of the day was a blur, I don't remember falling asleep, the last thought I had was hoping that tomorrow isn't some mean prank. *Entry End* 

I remember that. She's right, I was pretty upset that Chaz chose her over me. I mean, if it wasn't for me she never would have looked that good in the first place. I sighed placing the book back under the mattress. As I left the room I realized that I never asked how the date went and she never told me. Tomorrow's reading would be all new information, I hope she left in all the good parts. Unless of course she went home with him, I don't want to hear about that. A few hours later sleep won the battle once more and I drifted off to the dream world excited for what tomorrow could reveal.