Rain

June 13, 2009 Part 2

Time felt like it had slowed, the streaks that were drying on my face were becoming wet again. They had found her, my eyes traveled to the young, pretty female that was standing closely behind the officer. Her long blonde hair flowed to the middle of her back, sea blues had a softness that could not be describe. Her black pants suit with blue undershirt signified that she was a little more important than the officer that stood in front of her. Upon further inspection, I noticed that there is a large manila folder in her hands, the label sticking out was illegible and from my seat on the ground I couldn't see the front of it.

Her brilliant blue eyes met mine, it was like she was looking in to my soul, like she could see into my thoughts. A soft, peaceful smile spread across her tan face as she looked at me, it was one of remorse, one that said, "I'm sorry" I quickly looked away, focusing my attention back on the officer, his attention on me. I could see his lips moving, but the words that he was speaking sounded like the teacher from Charlie brown. I turned my head to look at my mom, her usual concerned look plastered on her tear stained face. She was speaking to me as well; however, it was the same result. Was I going crazy? I shook my head slowly hoping it would shake any of the cobwebs that may be distorting my hearing.

That didn't work either, a sense of panic started to rush over me. My breathing became erratic, my hands began to shake. The faster I took in a breath the less I felt like I was getting one at all, causing my heart to beat faster. Just as I thought I was about to go into a full-on panic attack a hand lands on my shoulder from behind, but everyone in the house was standing in front of me and none of them were touching me.

"Jade. It's going to be okay." The soft, distant voice said. My body froze, I wasn't sure if it was a man's voice or a female's voice but it didn't matter. My breathing began to slow, my hands stopped shaking and the voices around me became comprehensible.

"Jade, honey, are you okay?" The worried voice of my mother rang through my ears like a melody I long to hear.

"Ma'am are you able to stand? Do we need an ambulance?" The officer spoke with sincerity. My eyes lifted to meet his offering him a soft but confused smile. "No sir." I said quietly, slightly embarrassed that I was still on the ground. His female partner offered her hand with a with, as hesitant as I was I grabbed it anyway and allowed her to help me up. My mother let out a sigh of relief as she hugged me like she hadn't seen me in years. Part of me wanted to tell her to stop, the other part of me was happy that she was hugging me at all.

"Ma'am may we sit? We really must talk." The female finally spoke, her voice was soft, calming, just as you would expect from her. My mother gave me a worried glance before steeling her gaze and looking at the two of them. She didn't speak, only motioned with her arm that they may sit. Slowly we all made our way to the couch, sitting down one by one. My mother offered them tea or water and they both declined. There was an unbearable silence for a moment before the female finally spoke.

"Ms. Anderson, my name is Claire Dawson. I am a detective with the LA police department. When is the last time you spoke to Elizabeth?" Claire asked, her hand on the folder she had with her. Her eyes staying focused on my mother, the officer before her looking more and more uneasy. "It would have been in August. August 10th two years ago. She was going back from her break." My mother stated, the somber tone in her voice making it very clear that she was still very upset about my sister disappeared.

"Ms. Anderson, do you know anyone that would want to harm your daughter?"

"No, never. Everyone loved her. What is this about?" My mother's tone had switched from worried to frantic.

"I'm sorry but last night your daughter was found dead." Claire's eyes showed a sense of remorse as she stared at my mother's open mouth. Her lips were moving but no words were coming out. I too was in shock, I didn't know what to say or think. My sister wouldn't commit suicide, she had everything to live for. She wouldn't have left me here alone, knowing that Chaz was still in this town. Possible scenarios and multiple questions ran through my head, but before I could voice them my mother spoke.

"H-how?" She asked, obviously choked up.

"From what the medical examiner told us, it was an overdose. She died peacefully in her sleep." Claire answered, her eyes never leaving my mothers.

"No...no my sister wouldn't do that!" My words echoed throughout the house as my mother reached over to place her hand on my shoulder. A hand I quickly shoved off "She wouldn't. Leave me here..." My voice began to crack as the tears rolled down my cheeks, soft sobs soon followed. I couldn't be here, I had to get back to the book, I quickly jumped up running up the stairs in to Liz's room and slamming the door, locking it behind me. As I tripped and stumbled my way up the stairs I could hear my mother call my name but not follow me, I knew this was harder for her than me but I can't take this pain. I need to find out if she really did it, her last entry was dated for August 10th 2007. The day she left.

August 10, 2007 7:30 AM- Hello, I don't even know why I'm writing in this thing anymore. I can't get the feeling of his hands off me still. I can still smell the beer and vodka on his breath and his horrible cologne from time to time. The bastard even has the nerve to wink at me every time he sees me. I just......I want him to go away. He asked me to meet him today at the park, he wants to talk about something. Part of me doesn't want to go, but I want him to admit that what he did was wrong. Maybe it's wishful thinking on my part but I must go, anyway right? If only you could talk. We are meeting at 8 so I'm going to get going. You will get plenty when I return.

August 10,2007 2:00PM – The bastard!!!!! He didn't want to apologize he just wanted to try again. Luckily this time there were people and when I said no loudly he stopped. Before I left he told me something. "If you tell anyone I'll kill you." Usually I would laugh off such a threat but the look in his eyes. The fire, the pure hatred, the evil that was set within those eyes told me that he was serious. I left quickly after, hot tears ran down my face the entire drive home. I'm scared, scared he will follow me when I leave this town, even more scared that he will go after my sister. I hope she's smarter than I am, I hope she's careful. I wish there was a way I could warn her, but she would never listen to me even if I told her to stay away. I leave for California in about an hour, my mother and sister don't know I'm leaving but I'll leave them a note. Just saying I'm off to college. It doesn't matter, the most likely won't try to contact me anyway. Even if they do, I won't answer. I just to forget everything about this place, this world and start anew. Today I leave, but who knows if it's forever or not. They may never read this but Jade, Mom, I love you guys so much. Grandpa...I love and miss you. I know you are watching and I am sorry that I don't visit more often. I am sorry to do this to your daughter but I have to do what's best for me. Hell...I don't even know what's best for me. I don't even know me. ** Entry End**

My eyes swelled with more tears, falling onto the page in rapid fashion, almost sounds like rain as they flow. A sound hits the window causing me to jump, followed by several more similar sounds. "It's raining." I whispered softly as I hugged the dairy "You would be out there. Talking to grandpa." My voice was ragged from all the crying as I stood up. I knew what I had to do, I left the room quietly and went to the stairs peeking around the corner. My mother was still talking to the officers, I could tell she had been crying. I sighed softly, making my way to the back door, opening it quietly and stepping outside on the porch, closing the door behind me. The rain was coming down hard, it sounded like popcorn popping above my head as it hit the tin top of the porch roof. I took a deep breath and stepped out into the rain, tears still flowing from my eyes, a sob escaping every so often.

Like my sister, I pointed my head to the sky letting the rain fall all around me. "If you're watching me Lizzy, I am sorry. I should have believed you, I should have been there for you. I love you, very much. Grandpa if you're up there with her, I love you too." My words were soft, sincere, and once I finished speaking I closed my eyes and let the rain splash upon my face. I now understood my sister, or at least I think I do. I may never know if my sister committed suicide because the memory of Chaz became too much, or if Chaz finally found her and decided to shut her up, but I do know her memory will live forever in me. The rain fell around me like my own personal symphony, tears fall from my face, just like the rain from the sky. There's no better place to cry, than in the rain.

"Rain is grace; rain is the sky descending to the earth; without rain, there would be no life." – John Updike. 

A/N: Thank you so so much for those of you that read, voted, commented on this story. I knew I wanted it to be a short, emotional story and I hope I have accomplished that. I hope this story touches some of you in ways you never thought books could, I also hope that there is a lesson hidden somewhere within this story that we call can learn from. Thank you so much for reading -Cres