Rain

June 13, 2009

The sound of my door opening stirred me awake, sitting up in my bed my tired eyes tried to focus on the blur that was before me. My mother, standing in the doorway with a bright and cheery smile. It was unusual that she was home in the morning yet alone smiling at me. "What are you doing in here mom?" I ask with a stretch as I pull myself from my bed.

"There is a boy here for you." She whispered, attempting to conceal her giddiness.

"A...boy?" My thoughts scrambled, my heart started to race "Who-Who is it?" I managed to get out as I quickly went through some clothes in my drawer. My mother didn't answer me, just sat there staring at me with a goofy smile on her face. A roll of my eyes and an annoyed scoff told her that I was becoming annoyed. "Don't leave him down there alone mother. I'll be down in a second." I informed her, my head buried in my closet. Again, no words but the sound of her footsteps retreating let me know she got the hint.

At first, I was nervous but I was slowly becoming angry, who shows up at someone's door unannounced in the morning? Crazy stalkers, that's who. Clothes were coming from the closet like dirt being shoveled from a hole. At last I decide on a yellow top and black leggings, I may look like a bumblebee but oh well. No time for makeup, not that I was intending to impress anyone. I opened my door slowly and heard my mother talking but nothing from the mystery man. No time like the present, I said to myself as I made my way down the stairs. The face I saw when I hit the bottom stair was not a face I wanted to see.

"Chaz?" I ask bewildered and even more angry than before. What nerve he had coming to my house, standing here talking to my mother as if nothing ever happened. "What the hell are you doing here?" My hands are shaking with anger as I look into his eyes, a cocky smirk on his face. "GET. OUT." I barked in a much louder tone than he obviously expected causing him to raise an eyebrow.

"We need..."

"No. We don't need anything. What you need to do is turn around and get out of my house." I interjected before he could spout off the "We need to talk" line. My mother's eyes said it all, the look of disgust and disappointment bore through me like a hot knife through butter. It killed me to think that I was disappointing my mother my being a jerk to this guy, a guy who deserves it.

"I just want to talk Jade. That's all. Just hear me out and I'll leave." Chaz said, faking his best sad look.

"You don't have to leave. Jade doesn't own this house and she would be wise to remember her manners." My mother shot at me, followed by an icy glare. I've never seen my mother be so cold in my life. A lump caught in my throat as my mother pointed to the couch where Chaz was sitting, I took a deep breath and took my seat, hugging the arm of the couch as much as I could. I can't even look at him without wanting to punch him in his pretty boy face.

"Let's talk about this in private. Maybe in your room?" Chaz asked with yet another ridiculous grin. Did he really think that line would work? Especially after I know what he did to my sister? He was either dumber than he looked or extremely brave. Either way, I wasn't going to be alone with Chaz Forman anywhere. "As if you could get that lucky." I sneered struggling to contain the rage that was gradually building inside of me. I want nothing more than to tell him off, tell him to go away, but part of me wanted answers and now was the time to get them. Out of the corner of my eye I see my mother peeking her head around the corner from the kitchen. "Mother can you give us a moment please?" I asked hoping she would respect my request.

My mother stood silent for a moment, dumbfounded that I had seen her. I turned to face her as she encouraged her body to move from the doorway and up the stairs. "Look Ja-"My hand going up stopped whatever words were about to come out of his dirty mouth from coming. I waited a few more minutes, the sounds of her bedroom door latching let me know that we were truly alone.

"You were saying?"

"Jade I just want to say that whatever your sister told you it isn't true."

"You.." I paused trying to compose myself so the next words didn't echo throughout the house "Don't you sit here and lie to me Chaz. You're a disgraceful human being." I barked through gritted teeth. Tears starting to swell in the corner of my eyes. I didn't want to cry, I didn't want to show this bastard how much he hurt her, I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that what he did hurt me too.

"Jade listen." Chaz spoke softly scooting closer to me making me flinch and scoot away. The look in his eyes was one of regret and sorrow, but it didn't make up for what he had done to my sister. It changed nothing. "I was stupid." He said with a sigh "I didn't...I mean I though that's what she wanted." Chaz admitted keeping his gaze on me. A gaze that made my skin crawl, it felt like bugs were crawling all over me, just being this close to him was making me feel sick. His words making the anger grow, boil inside me like water on an open flame.

"You thought that's what she wanted!" The words came out faster than I could think. I was unable to bite my tongue, or control the tone and volume of my voice. "WHEN!? When she said NO?" I screeched starting to pace "I don't know what world you live in Chaz Forman but no does not mean do it anyway in this one." The hot tears stung my cheek like a bee sting flowing down my cheek with anger and sadness. Chaz went to say something but my grunt of frustration made him think better of it. "Why did you do it?" I asked through the soft sobs.

Chaz's eyes glanced at me briefly before moving back to the floor. There was an awkward silence, I could tell that the wheels in his head were turning, trying to figure out a way to explain to me why he did this. It doesn't really matter what excuse he comes up with, nothing is going to change the hate that I feel for him and the sadness that I feel for my sister. "I...." Chaz swallowed hard as his eyes gravitated to me "I don't know. I was young and I was stupid Jade. I'm sorry okay?" His voice shook like he was in a car that was driving over tons of large rocks. Our eyes met for the first time since he had been here, the feeling of anger intensified.

"You're sorry?" I asked with a soft chuckle. I was in fear that I may have lost my mind a little bit. "That's what you're going to say...That's all you're going to say!?" I screamed my voice cracking from the stress that I was putting on it. Chaz flinched as if I was going to attack him, no matter how much I wanted to it wouldn't change what had happen. Nothing could at this point. "Do you know where she is?" I asked quickly. Chaz didn't say anything, only shook his head. "Get out." I cried loudly pointing to the door "Get out now. Now." His legs couldn't move fast enough. Chaz opened his mouth to say something as the door slammed in his face.

Anger ran through me making my blood boil, my eyes caught a hint of movement at the top of the stairs. My mother is slowly making her way down the stairs towards me, a puzzled look plastered on her face. "Jade are you okay?" Her words hit me like a blast of air and all energy was drained from my legs as I fell to my knees in tears. My mother rushed over engulfing me in her arms, only making me cry harder. "Honey what's wrong?" My mother's words were soft and filled with fear. I opened my mouth to tell her but nothing came out, I lowered my head into her shoulder wrapping my arms around her. My hands grabbing a handful of her shirt from the back as another sob left my body. My mother held me close, softly humming "Don't worry be happy." A song she used to sing to Liz and I when we were kids. A loud knock on the door caused us both to jump. My mind immediately thought it was Chaz returning to say something, but when my mother swung the door open, there were two cops.

"Are you Dawn Anderson?" One of the police officers asked. My mother glanced back at me with a look that told me if they were here for me I was a goner.

"Yes I am. What can I help you with?"

"May we come inside? This is about your daughter Elizabeth."