All Of The Stars ☀ a.i • on hold

thought of you

*unedited*

"I saw a shooting star

And thought of you"

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I lay on the bed in my room,  no ones home at the moment they're all out at work, my aunt, uncle and my cousin Leila live here but I only really talk to Aunt Cheryl and that's only because I have to talk to her because she makes all my arrangements with therapy.

But I don't want to talk. I just want him.

I stare up at the ceiling there's a shooting star sticker that I stuck up there, it sounds childish but I have a reason.

*Flashback*

we lay side by side it's surprisingly cold for Sydney but we don't care, it's dark and you can see all the new glow in the dark stars that are on my ceiling they are stuck so they look like a shooting star.

They're so pretty, thankyou so much." I say

He turns to face me and I do the same we're so close that our noses are almost touching but it's not awkward we've been bestfriends since we were 6.

"you really like them? I wanted to get you something that had a meaning" He says quietly to me.

"Yes I love them, what's the meaning? " I ask.

"they're so that even when I'm not here with you when you may need me most, I'll be your shooting star your reason to smile so when you look at them you'll think of me and know I'll always be here."

He takes a long pause then says

"Good friends are like stars, you don't always see them but you know they are always there."

I smile "That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me you're the most amazing best friend ever" I say hugging him tightly.

He smiles at me "I do try" he jokes.

That's when I knew I felt something other then friendship towards Ashton.

*End of flashback*

I wipe away a few tears that I selfishly let out, I'm holding in all the tears, all the pain and I find if I let any out I'm just being selfish.There's people in much worse situations than me so I shouldn't cry over this.

"I saw a shooting star and thought of you" I mutter aloud as I fight back the tears. I need to see him, I need to know how he is. I don't necessarily have to let him know who I am I just want to know he's okay and that's he's happy. Because aslong as he's happy then im happy? well I can try.

I get up off my bed and reach into the bedside drawers I take out a small sticky note, it has my mum's number on she said to call her when I'm ready to speak to anyone from home. I get up and head downstairs to the landline phone I pick it up taking in a shaky breath as I start to push the buttons.

Then it starts to ring, I can feel my heart beating hard in my rib cage,  I take another shaky breath then I hear her, my mum.

"Hello?"