Unspoken

Chapter 1

(Hey! I hope you all enjoy my book, I have a huge plan for it and plot twists and everything so make sure you keep reading and vote! :D just to say, I imagine Naomi as Stella Hudgens:) )

I peep out from the covers and take a glimpse at life from outside my bed. I have no motivation to get up this morning, just like every other morning. But I have to. Its my first day back, after two months off of school. My mum is insistent that I make an effort to meet new friends, get out the house, get my life back. I didn't want to admit it to her, but I couldn't ever get my life back properly. Not with a gaping hole in my chest.

Caity died two months ago; my calendar speaks to me as I glance over at it, although it isn't much of a calendar anymore after I'd completely destroyed the month August.

Two months. Two months I've been sitting on my bed in a complete state of emptiness. I can't believe she's actually gone.

It was a horrendous day. The day my mum sat me on the couch and held my hand, while whispering through tears that Caity had been knocked down on her bike. I remember sitting there, staring at her with no emotion in me. Most people would scream, but i felt nothing.

She had been my best friend for around 3 years. And then within 2days of not seeing her, I had learnt she had been snatched from my world.

I sit up in bed and turn to the window. It's a sunny day at least, birds chirping from the trees. I can't help but check my phone for any messages, even though I know no one will have contacted me. It's the first time I've been able to look at my phone without throwing it at a wall in frustration and anger.

7:10. I need to get up.

7:20. I really need to get up.

I lay down in bed and promise myself I'll get up at 7:30, but I'm meant to be leaving the house at 8. It's so hard to go from 60 lazy days to waking up at 7 am.

My clothes are all screwed up in the drawer as I sift through them in search of a simple top and trousers. My quest for something decent to wear ends when I come across a blue top and black jeans.

Although I'm not ready for today at all, I have to make an effort. I have to. It's my first day at a new school and I causally missed the first 2 months. The least I can do is make an effort with what I wear and look like I am actually interested in learning.

My mums footsteps are making the stairs creak as I hear her make her way to my room. A quiet knock, signals that she wants to enter. "Come in." I reply quietly.

My mum looks worn out if I'm honest. Her hair is a mess and she looks so tired. Probably because she's had to basically be my carer for the past 2 months because I refused to eat and dress myself whilst in my state of shock and despair.

"You ready?" She cautiously asks, her eyes darting everywhere around my room, taking in the full extent of the damage. She hasn't actually been in my room for 2 weeks and my mind was in a bad place last week; my cupboards had been ripped apart and holes had been made in the wall as evidence.

Oops.

"Yeah, I suppose." I sigh, still fixing my makeup. "Good. I'm proud you've...I'm proud of you." She smiles at me. I am facing the mirror and can see her petite figure behind me with a really tiny grin emerging. To give her some comfort, I subtly smile back.

The door closes as she exits silently. I'm not ready for this. I'm really not. But I suppose I don't have a choice as my feet have somehow carried me to the front door. I have my bag, my books and my essential belongings. Now all I need is my motivation.

It's a long walk, but I'm not riding a bike.

This is the first time I've been out the house and fresh air actually seems to ease my nerves. Because this is a new school, I'm not quite sure where I'm going, but I have my GPS on my phone if I get lost. I pass countless trees, joggers, dog-walkers, but still can't seem to settle. I may look completely chilled-out on the outside, but inside, I'm restless. My tummy actually hurts from being so nervous that I want to cry.

I try to focus on other things. Like Tammy and Bella. I get to see them tonight, that's good...I think. Tammy and Bella are Caitys younger sisters.

After... Well yeah after the incident, I became closer with her sisters. They were so kind, they were honestly my best friends and the only people I'd allowed my mum to let into the house in the 2months following Caitys...death.

After almost an hour day-dreaming, walking by houses and parks and a lake, I see it. I see my new school, behind a few trees.

Knots tighten in my stomach as I walk through the gates. I've forgotten how to socialise, to talk, to even breathe at this point. But I don't have time for petty nerves, as I'm already walking up the steps.