short(er) stories

"I love you." (365 words)

"I love-" the phone hangs up.

"You," I say to the silent line.

"I love you." whispering the words to myself, I can almost taste the hurt they leave on my lips. I'm ridiculous. Not only for whispering words to no one that I have kept in my head forever, but also for using them on a person who had killed and disproved of each one over and over again.

I.

Who I am. No pieces left out or forgotten.

Love.

Something that doesn't come as naturally to me. Something that I truly thought I had obtained when you finally fell for me.

You.

The person I trusted and let hold my heart, even when I knew your hands were colder than ice.

You and your cold eyes. Eyes that claimed my body whenever they laid upon me. Eyes that I looked to when I needed a pure opinion.

Eyes that I loved.

Loved.

How quickly it changed from now to never. It's such a shame that I didn't see how much you were killing me. Quite surprising, actually. You made me feel alive when I was around you, but as soon as you left, my body would deflate and cave, every tense muscle easing, one at a time. I would collapse onto my bed, staring at the ceiling. Moments spent three minutes ago would be played out in my head. Frame by frame, I would scrutinize myself every time I did something wrong, chest sinking along with my heart, which broke a little bit more along with my confidence. Confidence in you, mostly.

I don't even need to explain why I don't have confidence left in you. After what you did to me, I couldn't look in the mirror without flinching at the reflection. You reduced me to less than nothing. The only thing left of my crippled soul was a burning desire to escape.

Now, I think I have. It hurts, God, it hurts like hell. But at least this pain is temporary. At least this pain will be what heals me in the end. It'll be okay.

I'll be okay.

Three new words I can count on. Three words that I believe in. Three words that will finally set me free. 

a/n 

the feels are strong with this one. (not based on a true story btw)

hope all you snickers are doin weell

-alex