Affection ||K.T.H

12

Written by Taemeaway

"Tae-Taehyung, let go, youre hurting me."

"I asked you a question." He fixed is gaze at me as i gulped, gripping onto the bottle of pills i had in my hand tightly.

"These are sleeping pills arent they? How much have you taken?"

"Dont be nosy Hana, dont try to dig out anything from me." He let go of his grip on my wrist, smashing the glass of water as i covered my ears.

"Taehyung, you know the side effects. Tell me, how much have you taken?" He ignored my words, picking up a piece of shattered glass before bringing it close to my neck.

"Stop, stop asking me."

"I need to know this! To help you!"

"I dont know!" I felt something sharp pierce through my neck as i winced in pain. In shock, Taehyung dropped the piece of glass, moving back as he gasped.

"Ha-Hana, I..I.." he stared at the now tainted glass as i brought my hand up to the wound on my neck. Fortunately, it wasn't too deep, but it was bleeding too much.

"Taehyung, its fine. I'm not in pain."

"You're bleeding." He fell on the floor as he looked at my wound, before looking down.

"That's what happened to him too, he died bleeding. And i caused everything. It's all my fault." Tears streamed down his face as he spoke, and I hurriedly wiped the excess blood with some tissues before crouching down before him.

"Tell me what happened that day, I'll listen to everything okay?" I pat his shoulders, smiling softly when he lifted his eyes to look at me. Nodding, he stood up, looking at my wound before walking to the kitchen, returning with a first aid kit.

"I'll help you bandage your wound." He sat down beside me as he disinfected the wound, making sure he wasn't pressing too hard.

"Ever since dad started being abusive, i found it hard to fall asleep. At first i didnt need the pills, i could fall asleep with music. But i dont know when it started getting so bad, i needed to resort to having those pills." He placed as bandage over my wound before continuing.

"It didn't help much though, so I figured maybe i wasnt taking enough of it. So every night before i slept, i took a handful of those pills and swallowed them. It helped alot. But at the same time, noona's cries became louder in my head. Appa's shouting became harsher. And even till today, i can hear Appa's shouting. Is he here to haunt me? Because i hurt him? But he deserved it!"

"Taehyung ah ..." my heart immediately softened at the sight of the boy looking all lost.

"He's here again ... he always comes back to visit me ! No matter how many times i stabbed and twisted the knife , he will never die ! I can hear him laughing and teasing me . I swear ! " He started shouting and his grip on my arm that was once gentle became harsh .

"He's going to hurt you too Hana . He thinks you are like my sister . I need to protect you , stay behind me . He is standing right there behind you , watch out ." He pointed at the back of me which i then had goosebumps . 

"Tae. I need you to look into my eyes." I said firmly knowing that he isnt stable now . Heck — he was never stable in the first place .

"Taehyung ah, i am not your sister , your Appa doesnt know me . He wont hurt me . He is dead — he isnt here in this room with us , you are hallucinating again . " I continued and hoped that his eyes would meet mine , believing me .

"Dont lie to me Hana , stop protecting Appa ! He will eventually attempt to take you away from me like how he did with noona . Noona isnt allowed to live with me anymore — its all his doings ! " With a low grunt , he forcefully let go of my arm with a swing before punching the wall next to me .

"Ta—"

"Shutup . You know nothing about Appa except that hes a bad guy . I've known him since young , i know his habits and how he is like . I see him everyday for fuck sake. "

" I see him sitting on the sofa every single day at 8pm for his soccer matches . He continues with tears streaming down his face , grabbing onto the remote controller till his knuckles turnt white .

"I still see him , make him go away Hana . Please , im begging you ."

After finishing his sentence , he dropped onto the floor along with the remote controller and knelt infront of me instead . Holding onto my two hands , he looked at me with tears all welled up in his eyes as if i was his only source of light in this darkness and i was his cure .