She found me and I found Allah

Chapter 10

"Do you really have to go?" I asked Ali.                                                                  "You know this is important or else I would never go, especially on a time like this," He said kissing my forehead. "Now let me go and say goodbye to Mom."    I nodded and smiled at him as he went.

             As I prepared food for Ali, I thought back to all the months that had passed by. It had almost been six months since Ali and I got married. Of course there were a few arguments but we both couldn't stay mad at each other. It had been almost three months since we found out about Ali's mom but alhamdulillah  (all praise is due to Allah alone) she was better than before. 
             Ali's sudden cry broke my trance. I turned around thinking it was just my imagination but it wasn't. I could hear him calling me loudly. Leaving everything, I ran to his mother's room. And after that, whatever happened felt like a dream. No one knew all of it would be this sudden.  And no one knew that she was going to leave on that particular day.
              She looked beautiful. I could see this faint smile on her face. A smile that wasn't visible much but if you looked closely, you would be able to identify it. I touched her but then forced myself to stop. She looked fragile. Almost as if she would break any moment. And her whole body; covered in white, she looked like an angel but she wasn't an angel because angels don't die. Human's die. And Ali's mom's death seemed something very unreal, especially since she was recovering very quickly. But this was the truth of life. It never promised us a tomorrow. Whatever we had, it was a 'now' ; always a present. Neither a past nor a future.
              I didn't know how to react and Ali was numb. Didn't react to anything the relatives said. All he did was nod at everyone who came.
              And I didn't know what to do. All I could do was sit, cry and think. This wasn't how it was suppose to turn out. I could hear some people around me saying that she shouldn't have died. Or it was an early death. But you see that's the ugly truth. Life itself is a lie; a lie that has to end. In the end whether someone  is there waiting for you or not, death is. It always is; because it has no age. Anyone can die. And thats the truth. You will die one day and we all know this. But what we don't know is the pain that comes afterwards. The unbearable pain, that leaves a void so deep, that no one can ever heal it; not even time.
            The men in the house  came near the coffin. It was time to take her. And I could see Ali standing and staring at her. It was very hard. Pain was etched on his face. I could tell that he was going through all those memories from the past once again.
           I stood from my place and slowly walked towards him. I hugged him and he softly kissed my forehead and then walked towards his mother's coffin and held it with the other men.
And then walked off carrying her. With each step he took, he realised that this would be it. She would be gone forever. And the thing that hurt him the most was the fact that he was the one taking her, only to go back home without her. And this time, he had no choice but to only leave her; alone. Forever.
  
~Ali's POV~
"Why Mama? Why so fast? And why so sudden?" I asked the one person who couldn't respond to any of my questions now. How I wished to hear her voice. My mother who was here yesterday is not here today.
"Mama... you were fighting yo--your cancer very strongly. People say that your time had come. They say that you're in a better place. But what about me Mama? How will I live without you? Yes, I know I have Aliya but you were my first true love. Yes we had a few fights but come on mama! We were fine after that. I love Aliya but I love you too. She is my phantom of delight but you are too!
Just tell me how do I get through all this Mama? Please." I kept saying all this and asking her questions as if she would wake up and talk to me. As if she would answer everything and kiss my forehead lovingly and smile at the way I kept calling her 'mama'.
             I sat next to her grave, trying to believe the fact that she was gone. It still felt like a horrible dream. A dream which would take years to come out of.
              As I sat next to her grave, I saw bits and pieces of my past life in front of me. From childhood to teenage and from teenage to adulthood. I saw it like a film. But the thing that hurt the most was the fact that the bad behaviour towards her and all the hurt I had caused her in the past was running in the film. It was nothing good. I realised I took her for granted. Who wouldn't I? She was my mother afterall. Someone who loved me unconditionally.  Someone who loved me through thick and thin. Someone who was there for me when no one else was. She was my friend when everyone left my side. The  trust she had  in me, reflected from her eye's silently.
           And now suddenly, everything was changed. They say that Allah (SWT) doesn't put more burden on his beloved ones than they can endure. But this pain I was going through, I don't even know if I could handle it.
           It was almost dusk. I had been here sitting next to her for almost 5 hours. I wish I could stay with her forever but this wasn't possible. I slowly cleaned my tears and stood up to go home. Aliya would be worried and waiting for me.
            As I walked back towards my home, I saw people on the walkway. Some were with kids and other's were with their Mother's. They reminded me of my Mom and only if they knew how lucky they were to have her by their side. They were taking her for granted, not realising the fact that they might only have a moment with her; because no matter how much time you spend with your mother, it will always be a moment. Because moments pass by like a train and the next thing you know is that she's gone.
          My mother used to say that  a person who realises the worth of another while they are still a part of their life; are very lucky. Because after a person leaves, there's no point looking at all the bad things and think about all the good things you could have done instead; because once a person leaves, there's a possibility that they might never come back. I never understood all this back then but today, I understood it pretty well.
             Thinking about her, I kept walking  home, hoping that Aliya would be safe and not too worried.

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Hey guyss! A little something I hope you all like! Yes no excuses this time! Im going to try updating regularly ☺.
Enjoy!