/Stand By Me/ Gifs / Imagines /

/Gordie/

(Video/song of inspo. At the bottom! Although I changed the story a little and names of course)
I paced back and forth in the living room floor for around thirty minuets stopping momentarily only to check outside the window.
"Where the fuck is he" I mumble taking a deep breath and sighing as I close the curtain for the hundredth time that night.
Moping around I try to focus on anything else that might help; the clock ticking, the water dripping as I shuffle through the kitchen, even the creaking of the old wood as I walk across the floor panels.
'He's been gone all fucking night' I think looking at the clock and seeing it was 4 a.m.
I decide to go back to my original position on the staircase in the hallway.
I had a million words loaded up in my head and I was ready to fire as pleased when he got home.
I buried my face into my hands and realize I had been crying this whole time.
As soon as I do so I hear a key at the front door and someone stumble in.
I get up and rush to the entrance and see him. Just standing their struggling to stay upright. I shove him and struggle to form all of those words I wanted to say but instead I couldn't think strait anymore.
"WHERE WERE YOU!?" I struggle to say I immediately feel sick to my stomach and watch as he smirks and shakes his head.
"ITS BEEN NINE GOD DAMN HOURS GORDON! NINE FUCKING HOURS I HAD TO SIT HERE WORRYING ABOUT YOU! YOU DIDN'T EVEN SAY GOODBYE JUST A 'Oh I'm goin' out with my friends' AND A MEANINGLESS WAVE!" I yell.
"Well it was a hell of a wave...wasn't it." He scoffs and rolls his eyes.
I look at him an watch as he lifts a cigarette in his mouth. I grab it out of his mouth and throw it across the room.

"THATS FUCKING KILLING YOU!" I point to the rolled toxin on the floor.
He says nothing but puts on a bored look.
"WHAT ABout your...your fucking daughter" I raise my voice "she waited too! She said she didn't get to say goodnight! And where were you? The gentleman's club I'm guessin'?
Am I wrong!?" I yell and could barely see, thanks to the tears running like a river down my face. Yet it was by far better than looking at the monster slowly forming in front of me.
"What happened to you!?" I yell shoving him again.
He just raises his arms defensively and looks down.
'Our daughter might not have gotten to say goodnight but he ain't gonna get to say goodbye to her either' I say to myself and swiftly point to the door.
"Get the fuck out" I say looking at the ground trying not to meet his gaze.
He seems to snap out of whatever he was thinking and slowly approaches me.
"Hey Y/N...baby, you don't mean that?" He says softly his voice smooth but cold.
"Yes, I do...Gordie" I run my hands through my hair "I'm tired of your behavior and fighting with each other. Sometimes when you act recklessly I can barely recognize you, this isn't who your are Gordie. I didn't fall in love with a monster. It's not healthy for us but more importantly it's not heathy for Claire...you are suppose to be a role model not an influence.
I remember when you still cared about yourself and us. It's not working anymore, you and I both know it too" I say shake my head and cross my arms.
"So I'm going to say it one more fucking time, get out of my god damn house"
I could tell he was crying but his voice surprised me. It was his actual voice not the rough one he would put on for intimidation.
"You don't think I didn't realize!" He yells and looks away "I knew damn well what the hell I was doing...I didn't like it but I couldn't help it" he adds.
I shift my weight.
"I'm lost...suffering what ever the fuck you wanna call it...I'm just hopeless!" His voice cracks as he gasps for another breath.
He turns sharply and looks into my eyes, his full of regret and mine full of mistrust "Y/N, believe me when I say I never had the intention to hurt you or Claire, and I'm sorry" his voice cracks again and he begins to lose all calm again as tears formed like an endless ocean of sorrow "I never wanted it to come to this and...ever since Ch-Chris-" his words were jumbled and slurred also not able to finish the sentence.
He falls apart in front of me.
Something I hadn't seen since we were both mature and tragedy struck.
I couldn't clear my thoughts but only restraining back from going to him and feeling sorry for him was the fact we went through the same thing and we go through the same things. My eyes now hurt from crying and my lungs are given out and tired from yelling.
"Gordie" I now use a gentle tone "I don't know what your going through...honestly...but this is something you vowed to tell me, remember, on our wedding day you said you would tell me your struggles and insecurities for they are mine too. I don't forgive you for what you did" he looks confused but immediately looks away, I start speaking again "but one thing I can forgive you is for lying. You vowed you would speak the truth, be faithful, and care for me...Till death do us part. You failed to care for me when you had to try and sort these emotions out on your own. But you didn't...you lied to me but yet I still loved you" I say watching him for what seemed like forever.
I could tell he was thinking and then he approached me and closed his eyes.
"I'm sorry" he whispers and I watch a lone tear escape and curve around his face. He opens his eyes and all I see is starry night and a tall mountain raising above the clouds waiting for its story to be told.
He turns and walks out the door closing the door quietly behind him.
Like he said, he wasn't helpless, just hopeless. I look at the bent cigarette on the ice cold laminated floor.

Love is a cigarette, it starts out brand new.
The length like a timeline, you light it receiving a surge of energy.
You inhale loving the feel of the rush, but forgetting that your time is depleting.
You then exhale watching the smoke fade off and become distant, finally evaporating.
You look at the cigarette, now nothing but a fraction of what it started out as, and throw it to the ground finally stepping on it like it meant nothing to you, when in reality it was putting another nail into your coffin.
Then only a while later you move on to the next going over the same thing slowly becoming addicted.

IM BACK! Yay! I'm going to explain soon but I just had fam problems and school was really impacting my time and I just had no effort to do writing anymore but I just started to get impulses and I really REALLY wanted to write! So here ya gooooo! Hope ya' enjoy and please don't mind my writing I'm a little rusty ❤️ Lovya!!! -Kace
P.S. Also that last part was originally ONE SENTENCE and it became a mothafuckin' metaphor slam!
**poetry claps** its weird how they don't have a emoji for 'snapping' but one for this---> 🔌?