Adolescent Suicide *Sequel to All I Am*

Toxic: The Taste Of Your Lips, I'm On A Ride

wow i love being suicidal.

"Some times I can't believe you Gerard Way. I can't fucking believe you!" Lindsey said on the other side of the phone. I called her right before I came to Erins house, telling her I left.

I put my head in my hands. "No, Linds, you don't get it. I'm just-"

"Trying to help, yeah, I get that. Don't come home Gerard." Her harsh tone sas followed with an even harsher click.

I knew I messed up, but I didn't care.  I knocked on Erin's door. She opened it.

Erin looked tired, the circles under her eyes were almost completely black and she smelled slightly different. Her hair was just thrown up in a ponytail, her clothes the same from the night she left and her smile was sad. But she still looked so beautiful to me.

"Hey Gerard!" everything she said seemed to be extened out, but I just smiled and waved to her. She grabbed my arm and pulled me in the house.

"Dude, I'm making waffles." she said as we walked into the kitchen. Her hands were shoved into the pockets of her sweatpants. I nodded.

Erin hopped up on the kitchen counter and pulled a rolled up piece of paper from behind her ear and grabbed a lighter from her pocket. She put one end of the paper in her mouth and lit the other one. She inhaled slowly then removed the paper and held her breath for a moment before exhaling. She smiled contently, taking another hit and then returning the joint behind her ear and leaving the lighter on the counter.

"Oh, sorry. How rude of me, would you like a hit?" she asked walking over to her waffle maker abd removing the waffle.

"Since when do you smoke?" I asked ignoring her question entirely.

"Since I watched Grandma's Boy and thought that that is what game designers are supposed to do. Don't get too in a tizzy, it's legal here."

"I know but-" I cut myself off trying to word an argument correctly. "Does it make you happy?" Erin nodded. "And the others, they let you smoke in the house?"

"Not usually, I normally hot box my room but they're gone so I'm doing whatever I wish." Erin takes a large bite of her waffle.

"Where are they anyway?" I ask just now realizing that no one but her is home.

"Celebrating." She laughs and shakes her head. "They think it's over. They think we've won."

"It's not? We didn't?"

"No. Gee, it'll never be over. Don't you get that. This is a gang, they won't stop until they have what they want." She takes another bite of her waffle.

"Erin, I will not, ever, let anything hurt you. As long as I'm here youre safe. I swear." I pull her close and all I can smell is the marijuana in her hair before she pulls me into a kiss.

not sure if i should put a disclaimer about marijuana or not but, i think it's easy to assume my opinion is that im for it. if youre not, thats fine, if you are thats cool. just dont get yourself in trouble.