A few minutes later they were lying in the bathtub. Dec holding Ant safely inside his arms. He wasn't prepared to ever let him go again even if that sounds unrealistic. But when it was about Ant his logical comprehension seems to switch off anyway. He just wanted to protect him from everything that was out there and sometimes from himself as well.
As confident and feisty he may seem in public as scared he was when it come to his private life. Too often had he gotten hurt already.
It was the same for him but just being with Ant had given him the safety to continue. And deep inside he knew that Ant felt the same. He only had to see and accept it. He probably already had, at least this morning was sign to it.
Dec's fingers caressed Ant's left arm. The fingers of their right hand were interlaced. Ant was leaning against Dec, completely relaxed, dozing slightly. Seeing him in this state made Dec close his eyes as well, enjoying the moment and the closeness to Ant. Feeling him skin on skin, touching every detail of his body. It had been far too long already.
His fingertips explored the soft skin. Tracing small circles on the back of Ant's hand, entwining their right hands as well.
He pulled Ant a little closer, burying his nose behind his ear. The familiar scent and the feeling of the wet hair made him sigh contently. He started to press slight kisses onto the sensitive skin.
"I missed you." Dec murmured without stopping his actions. Only softly, not wanting to wake Ant, in case he had fallen asleep.
"Mhh... I was here." He said, moving his head slightly so he could press a kiss on Dec's lips.
"Not like this..." he sighed. "So close to me. Just you. Missed this – missed you."
"Missed you too, Decky. It's strange, since we are together I feel like I'm going mad when you're not around." He held up their still entwined hands and put them on top of his heart.
"It feels as if something is missing here, when you're not that close." His voice was hoarse and quiet, as if he was afraid of saying it out loud.
"I feel exactly the same, Anth."
"I haven't thanked you yet, Dec."
"What for?" He asked, not sure what his boyfriend meant. He didn't ecpect any thank-you's.
"For so many things. I don't even know where to start."
"You don't have to start anywhere, Anth. Everything I do, especially in connection with you, I do voluntarily."
"I know that. Still... All of this is no matter of course. Everything you did for me these last few weeks especially that is worth more than just a thank-you.
"Ant..."
"No, let me. Please..." He turned around and looked Dec straight into the eyes.
"Okay." He pulled Ant's head closer. He just had to kiss him. Only short, to show him, that he listened. Always.
Ant wandered over Dec's neck with his nose, pressing little kisses onto it. Something was happening and Dec wanted to know what.
"Dec..." He murmured, soft lips touching his skin. "Only with you I can lose myself, knowing that you will catch me if I fall, that I am safe, don't need to be afraid. Even if it took a while for me to understand that. Now I know it. All you did these last weeks, especially in that interview..." He looked back up into those blue eyes.
"... You confessed your love for me. Publicly. Without giving me a chance to react, to reply. You made me so happy in that moment. Suddenly everything else wasn't important anymore.
"I just told the truth, Anth. That, what I tried to show you for so long, put into words.
"I know, Decky. And I'm sorry it took me so long because actually I know it for quite a while now..."
"Know what?" Dec's voice was shaking slightly. Out of hope and a little bit of fear but most of all anticipation.
"That I love you." The smile on Ant's face wasn't from this world anymore.
Dec looked at him and couldn't move his gaze if he wanted to. He just couldn't get enough of it. He had hoped it would happen, but to hear it now... He batted his eylids, totally overcome by his emotions. Never before had he felt like this. He knew that this was it. That Ant and him belonged together. He loved him more than anything and will eternally. He had found the other part of his soul and his heart.
"Have you heard what I said?" Again you could hear the insecurity in Ant's voice.
"Yes." He whispered, with the biggest smile on his face.
Cautiously he puts his hand on Ant's cheek and pulls his head in a little closer.
"I love you, Ant." Only seconds later their lips met for a kiss.
