okay i lied

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So like person A can absorb people's superpowers by licking them and can use said powers, but is not a superhero.

Like imagine them in the marvel universe, being like one of the people who holds stop signs in front of schools and like an attack happens and an empty car comes hurtling towards the walking children and person A just like nonchalantly puts a hand up and the car crashes into them but they are unharmed and the children are terrified and their just like "okay, get your ass' into the bomb shelter"

And person B is like "what the fu-"

(And that's the story of how I met your (parental figure))

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