Funny Facts & Jokes

boys will be boys ;)

MAN RULES!

AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL

DOWN

FINALLY, the guys' side of the story. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT'S

PRETTY GOOD.)

WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE

NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE!!

THESE ARE OUR RULES!

(PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!)

1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL.

IF IT'S UP, U PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT

DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU

LEAVING IT DOWN.

1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS

ONE:

SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!

STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!

OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!

JUST SAY IT!

1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO

ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP

SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT

YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN

AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL

AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T

ASK US.

1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO

WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY,

WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US

HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.

IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT

YOURSELF.

1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE

TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS

AND NEITHER DO WE...

1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS

DEFAULT SETTINGS..

PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN

IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE

WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE

LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER

TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..

1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY

ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.

1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS

YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS

FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.

1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO

SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN

REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...

damn XD my elder brother actually send it to me!!! that crazy dude!! anywys comment & vote!!!!