Escaped Thoughts

Ive lost myself

12.10.17

I've lost myself

I don't know who I am

I am an empty shell of a person

If you can even call me a person

All my responses

And reactions

Are preprogrammed

In my hardwired brain

I am dull

With no personality

I always agree to what people say

Never voicing my own opinion

Because I don't have one

I don't know what to think

I don't know what to say

So I stick with a neutral response

That will hopefully slip me by

But when I keep responding with that same response

I don't slip by as easily

I realize that

I don't HAVE a personality

I don't HAVE anything that makes me special

I'm literally just, there

I don't know who I am

I don't remember what I was like

That's why nobody talks to me

Because I'm boring

And dull

And barely even a person

I don't have a personality

I don't stand out

I'm not special

I don't know who I am

I have nothing that makes me, me

I when you describe other people

You can say so much about them

That makes them special

And reasons why you love them

But when you describe me

You're scrambling for scraps

Of a personality that's barely even there

And whatever you've managed to gather

Are just generic things you could say

About literally anybody else.

I have nothing that makes me special

I don't have a personality

I don't know who I am

I've lost myself.