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Recording on an Australian tax help line
Just before the final exam in
my college finance class, a less-than-stellar student approached me.
“Can you tell me what grade
I would need to get on the exam
to pass the course?” he asked.
I gave him the bad news. “The exam is worth 100 points. You would need 113 points to earn a D.”
“OK,” he said. “And how many points would I need to earn a C?"
My collection of vintage kitchen utensils includes one whose intended purpose was always a mystery. It looks like a cross between a metal slotted spoon and a spatula, so I
use it as both. When not in use, it
is prominently displayed in a
decorative ceramic utensil caddy
in my kitchen.
The mystery of the spoon/spatula was recently solved when I found one in its original packaging at
a rummage sale.
It’s a pooper-scooper.
To avoid taking down my Christmas lights, I’m turning my house into an Italian restaurant.
Librarians may be shy, but
their patrons aren’t. Look at their oddball requests:
-A patron offered me $100 to steal
a cactus from somebody’s yard.
-A patron wanted me to find a
book to teach her dog German.
-A patron on his way to the casino asked to rub my red hair for luck.
-A patron once asked me for my home phone number so she could call me with reference questions when I wasn't at work.
When my coworker answered his phone, the confused woman on the other end asked, “Who is this?”
“This is Steve. With whom did you wish to speak?”
After a pause: “Did you just say whom?”
“Yes, I did.”
The woman replied, “I have the wrong number,” and hung up.
I'd probably be Steve.
