Jealousy || T.Holland ✓

4

Smut and a single profanity :))
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I hate Tom so much.

I hate him for making me love him.

I hate him for making me think he loved me.

I hate him for making me the other woman.

The worst night of my life happened at a friend's birthday party.

Tom was there and I had successfully avoided him for most of the night, but when I did finally come into contact with him, we both had consumed a large amount of alcohol.

My first mistake was allowing him to take me upstairs after he had said he wanted to speak to me some place quiet.

The moment we reached the room, I could feel the tension. We sat on the bed and stared at each other for what seemed like forever, but then he began leaning in.

At that moment, I forgot about all the important things. I forgot that we weren't together anymore and that he had a girlfriend, but at that time, he was the most important thing to me and that's why I kissed him.

I kissed him passionately and needily, because I did need him and I wanted him to know it.

He was the same way; pulling me as close to him as possible, moving his hands all over my body, slowly trying to remember each part of me.

"You're so beautiful," he spoke softly as he stared into my eyes and caressed the scar on my cheekbone.

God, I remember the feeling his words gave me. My heart ached at his words from both excitement, love, and sadness. "Would I still be beautiful in the morning?" I whispered with tears brimming my eyes at the thought of him just using me, because he needed a quick fuck.

His brown eyes filled with sadness as his thumb wiped a tear that had fallen down my cheek. "You'll always be beautiful to me," he replied before capturing my lips in a soft and slow kiss.

That's how our night went; him taking everything at a slow pace.

The night we shared reminded me so much of our first time together, but this time he made it last, because we both knew that we wouldn't be getting this moment again.

He intertwined our hands and squeezed them tightly as he slowly pushed himself into me.

His head would dip down and rest on my shoulder as the pleasure took over him.

Soft kisses were placed along my skin as a reminder that he saw me as more than just a body for the night.

Loud moans of my name were a reminder that he knew I was the one doing this to him, making him feel this way. He wasn't thinking about anyone else, only me.

An 'I love you' had slipped out of his mouth during our intimate moment, but he didn't let it stop him. He embraced it with a kiss on my lips and a smile as he looked over my features.

Afterwards felt just as amazing as before. His body crushed me in the best way possible as my hands ran along his spine, occasionally moving to his hair, gripping it softly. His lips continuously were attatched to my hot skin and his arms wrapped around my body as if he was afraid I was going to disappear if he wasn't touching me in some way.

It felt so much more than just a one night thing, but when morning came and he told me this was all a mistake, I knew that my feelings clouded my judgment once again.

I hated him so much after he left, because I know he was going back to his hotel room where he'd probably call Zendaya and tell her how much he loved her.

I hated myself mostly in this situation. Zendaya deserved more than to have a guy who cheated on her with his ex.